Underappreciated Performances- Marilyn Monroe in "All About Eve"

She’s only onscreen for two minutes and twenty-seven seconds but Monroe makes one hell of an impression in the already impressive cast of Joseph L. Mankiewicz’s All About Eve. As Miss Caswell, the "graduate of the Copacabana School of Dramatic Arts," Monroe, doing what she always did well, brings vitality and humor to a trite, dumb blonde role. With the help of venomous theater critic Addison de Witt, Miss Caswell has only one goal- to the nab the role of Margo Channing’s character’s sister after the original leaves the production- and by God she tries her damnedest to achieve it. After being told by Addison to go speak to producer Max Fabian, she coolly asks, "Why do they always look like unhappy rabbits?" and, without breaking a sweat, turns on an infectious smile and struts over to speak with him. She may be a blonde, but she isn’t a dummy. Miss Caswell realizes that she has to use her sex appeal to get her foot in the door and plays it up to full effect. And, just like in most of her later work, she uses her own smarts to make a point. For example, after yelling out "Oh, waiter" to a man carrying drinks and he ignores her, Addison explains that he is not a waiter, but instead a butler. Miss Caswell believes that she can’t yell out "Oh, butler" because "what if his name is Butler?" Addison tells her, "You have a point. An idiotic one, but a point."

A couple of seconds later, Max offers to get her a drink and she smiles coyly at him. Addison notices her charm and says, "Well done. I can see your career rising in the east like the sun." Nothing could have been truer about Marilyn in 1950. Miss Caswell may have bombed her audition and have to settle for television, but Monroe became a sensation by 1953 and eventually became a cultural icon like no other. For many years, people accused Monroe of having little talent until Some Like It Hot, but take a look at her appearance in All About Eve and you’ll see a bright young woman taking full advantage of the chance of a lifetime and doing it brilliantly.

Marilyn Monroe didn’t receive a Best Supporting Actress Oscar nomination in 1950 for her work in All About Eve, but two of her castmates (Celeste Holm and Thelma Ritter) did. So, head on over to StinkyLulu’s 1950 Supporting Actress Smackdown and check out mine and four other bloggers opinions about the nominees for Best Supporting Actress in 1950. I hope you enjoy it- I had tons of fun preparing for this!

Rants on "Notes on a Scandal"

I don't know how I missed this one in theaters, but when Notes on a Scandal came out on DVD a couple of weeks ago, I quickly rented it to see for myself just how campy and trash-tastic it was made out to be. Don't worry- I wasn't disappointed and neither will you. Notes is definitely campy but it's actually a pretty well made film that rises above the cliched plot that could have hindered it.

Dame Judi Dench is brilliant as lonely spinster teacher Barbara Covett. If you thought Dench couldn't be any more intimidating than she was in Casino Royale and Pride & Prejudice, you would be dead wrong. Just look at this shot from the beginning of the film where she stares down her students after the bell rings and they start leaving without being dismissed.


Chilly. I'm scared just looking at it. Imagine being one of those students and having someone like the Dame as your teacher. I think I just peed my pants.

A new teacher named Sheba Hart (Cate Blanchett) is introduced to the staff and at first Barbara can't figure her out. One of the best lines in the film is when she writes in her diary, "Is she a sphinx, or simply stupid." Barbara is perplexed by her and it seems that she wants to find out more about her. So when Sheba invites Barbara over to her house for lunch and Sheba starts spilling her guts out (as, when Barbara puts it, women of her class are prone to do) Barbara sinks her claws in.

Soon, Barbara uncovers a dark secret of Sheba's: she is having an affair with a 15-year old student. At first Barbara is hurt that Sheba wouldn't confide this to her, but she soon realizes that she basically owns Sheba now. Out of "friendship", Barbara keeps this secret to herself, but insists that Sheba ends the affair.

Naturally, the affair doesn't end and, feeling betrayed, Barbara is forced to unearth this scandal, leading to an explosive, camp-tastic finale. This is where Blanchett as Sheba finally comes alive, applying thick, dark eyeliner, smacking Barbara around and finally releasing that battle cry of "HERE I AM!" It's a golden moment and one of the most memorable of 2006.



Dench is brilliant and Blanchett, while not as good, is clearly having a ball and deserves major camp kudos for her confrontation of Barbara. Notes on a Scandal is not a great film in the manner of Brokeback Mountain or The Departed, but it is one hell of a good time and one of the most interesting movies of 2006.

My Rating: **** 1/2

Jordin is the Season 6 American Idol!

Congratulations Jordin! I wish you all the success in the world!

Shows I'm Looking Forward to This Summer

With all of my shows wrapping up (Desperate Housewives, American Idol, House), I now get to look forward to some new shows and returning favorites this summer. Here's a rundown on the stuff I will be watching this summer:

House of Payne (TBS): I know a lot of people hate Tyler Perry and Madea, but I think that Perry writes really good escapist, silly comedy (his melodrama could stand a lot of improvement) and that Madea is one hilarious woman (that chainsaw scene in Diary of a Mad Black Woman is brilliant and "You gonna call the po-po, ho?" makes me laugh everytime). I saw the commercial for this new show while I was watching the end of Erin Brockovich on TBS and I got really excited because House of Payne is a sitcom made by Tyler Perry and it looks like Madea makes an appearance on there. I'm in.

Hey Paula! (Bravo): Paula Abdul was the first singer I ever fell in love with back in the day and I've held a special place in my heart for her ever since. Imagine my happiness when she came back as a judge on American Idol and was in the spotlight back again. And now she has her own Bravo reality show which should make me love her even more (it worked for Kathy Griffin).

Hell's Kitchen (Fox) and Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares (BBC America): Fuck Rachael Ray, Gordon Ramsay is my favorite celebrity chef. Between these two shows, we see two different sides to his personality. On Hell's Kitchen, he is an angry maniac prick who is ultimately likeable. On Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares, he helps people transform failing restaurants into big booming businesses and is nowhere near as angry as he is on his American show.

Footballers Wives (BBC America): So the American version won't be on this season, but at least we'll get the next season of this addictive British soap opera. And that means more of my favorite bad girl Tanya Turner-Lazlo (aka "The Merry Widow"). Yes, please.

Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List (Bravo): The show I wait for every summer is back for its third season. Even if it's missing some major characters (her thief ex-husband and her father who recently passed away) this season still looks rather promising. Jill and I will definitely be discussing this show religiously.

American Idol Recap- Finals Edition

I know I've been covering American Idol like mad these past few weeks, but after tonight the show will (sadly) be over until next January and you won't hear anything about it. Last night was the Finals between Blake and Jordin and, like always, it was a slobberknocker. The first round went to Blake as he sang "You Give Love a Bad Name" perfectly yet again while Jordin tried Christina Aguilera's "Fighter." She sang it nicely, but it lacked the edge and anger that it needs (and that Christina gives it). The next round went to Jordin as she sang Martina McBrides's "Broken Wing" beautifully and almost as well as the original. Blake sang another Maroon 5 song, "She Will Be Loved," and he did sing it better than Adam Levine, but it wasn't as good as Jordin.

Now, this is the part where I started to get angry at the show. You remember how they announced at the beginning if the season that they were looking for someone to write the song that the winner will release as a single? Well, supposedly they did that because every song after "A Moment Like This" sucked major balls and they wanted to find one that would actually get played on the radio. I was happy to hear this because all of those inspirational songs that the winners were forced to release were terrible and were only listenable because of the singer. So imagine my surprise when after all this hoop-la that they pick the cheesy inspirational song "This Is My Now" that sucks worse than Fantasia's "I Believe" and even Carrie Underwood's "Inside Your Heaven." I was so upset when I heard Blake singing this song because it is not his style at all. His voice and talents don't lie in cheesy inspirational ballads. He looked so frustrated singing the damn song that even Simon pointed it out. On the other hand, the song is right up Jordin's alley and she did all that she could with it. How fair is this? Jordin will win now because of that damn song and it doesn't seem right.

Come back tomorrow for my thoughts on the Season Finale and the eventual winner (even though we kinda know who it is at this point).

Blake Lewis Should Win "American Idol"

I've been watching American Idol from the beginning and I have never seen a contestant like Blake Lewis before. To me, American Idol has been all about the women: Kelly Clarkson, Fantasia, Mandissa, Jennifer Hudson. Very rarely have I ever supported a man (the only exception has been Chris Daughtry last year and, once he was unfairly eliminated, my only other choice was Elliott Yamin because I hated Katharine McPhee and Taylor Hicks) but now I feel I have to. Sure, Jordin is technically a better singer than Blake (as most women are compared to their male counterparts), but I think that Blake has something more important than a better voice.

Blake is not only the most original contestant on this season's show, he is one of the most original finalists in the show's entire run. Everything from his clothing, to his strange, uninhibited dance moves to his crazy-ass beatboxes (which is so good for a white guy he puts Justin Timberlake to shame), screams originality and really makes all of the contestants look rather boring. Now, take a look at his song choices from week to week. Every week he goes out on that stage and takes mega chances by Blake-itizing his song choices. Sometimes they work ("You Give Love a Bad Name" was genious and "You Keep Me Hanging On" really is a lot better than the judges gave him credit for) and sometimes they don't (let's not even get into Barry Gibb week), but he always keeps us guessing. And when he isn't "Blake-itizing" songs, he sings with such sincerity on "Somewhere Only We Know" and "Imagine" that even if they aren't "great" by Melinda Doolitttle standards, they are earnest and touching.

Plus, have we ever had a man as young and good-looking on American Idol before (don't anyone dare say Sanjaya in the comments)? I should say not. I mean, for God's sakes, this show has produced such fugly men as Ruben Studdard, Taylor Hicks, Justin Guarini and the Gayken (and now Elliott Yamin with that terrible Jew-fro). I think it's about time we have gotten an Idol who can not only sing and make great music but actually look attractive.

To quote my friend Ashley, after Taylor Hicks "we need a cool white guy." I couldn't agree more. Here's hoping he picks great songs, sings the hell out of them and Jordin sucks balls on Tuesday night!

Bienvenue a Cannes...What Were You Thinking, TCM?

I don't know if any of you watch TCM, but the other night they aired their newest documentary Bienvenue a Cannes all about the Cannes film festival. Normally, I love their documentaries. Their recent Brando one was immensely fascinating and really peaked my interested in him again. I also loved their one about famed movie producer Irving Thalberg a couple years ago and then there are the ones about Garbo, Bette Davis and Clara Bow (among many others) that were fabulous to the extreme. So, naturally I was really anxious to watch this new documentary and imagine my surprise when it sucked as badly as it did. I thought the film would be more of a history of the festival, but the only thing in the past that it covered was the '68 cancellation and the French New Wave directors (Jean-Luc Godard and Francois Tuffaut) protesting during that aborted festival. A lot of the film was about Harvey Weinstein bragging about how much his films that won Palme d'Or's (1989's sex, lies and videotape, 1994's Pulp Fiction, 2004's Fahrenheit 9/11) changed the face of filmmaking (or something along those lines....he really is an ass). Really, the documentary was more concerned about the atmosphere of the current Cannes festivals (red carpets and the nightlife....ooooh, riveting). The only thing that was halfway interesting was the small section about the festival juries and the politics that goes on with it. If only they had centered this documentary about the history (which I know very little about and would have loved to learn about) then I would have been more interested. Here's hoping TCM's next one doesn't suck this bad.

Melinda Doolittle...NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Oh my God, how could America be so stupid! How can they even live with themselves for voting off poor Melinda! She is one of the most brilliant singers the show has ever produced. I was all ready for her to win the whole damn thing. Once that douchebag Ryan Seacrest announced that Jordin was safe, I figured that Blake was going to be sent home and was preparing in my mind a post about how wonderful and unique Blake is/was to American Idol. But then he said those dreaded words to dear Melinda and I was so upset. If they were going to send a woman home, why not Jordin? She's a great singer but not in the same league as Melinda. What makes me even more worried now is if we'll ever hear from her again. If she would have won, she would have released a couple of albums, and even if they weren't successful, you would have been exposed to her. But now that she's voted off, I'm scared that she'll release one album, not find her audience and then be never heard from again. I really hope this doesn't happen to her- it would be a damn shame.

Oh, and by the way, next week I will definitely be rooting for my Blakie. I'm really not sure who is going to win at this point (Blake has the teenage girls and me, Jordin has the adults who love good singers), but it looks like that either of them can take it with Melinda out of the way.

American Idol Recap- Top 3 Edition

Wow, what an improvement over last week! All three of the finalists were fantastic and gave great performances. Here's the rundown on last night:

Jordin Sparks "Wishing On a Star": A cute little contemporary performance, but nothing we haven’t seen from her before.

Blake Lewis "Roxanne": An odd song choice from Paula for Blake (is she trying to turn him into Chris Daughtry or something?) but he pulled it off surprisingly well. Much, much better than last week, thank God.

Melinda Doolittle "I Believe in You and Me": The perfect type of song for Melinda to be singing (a Whitney Houston power ballad) and she even sings it differently than I would imagine. Very nice Melinda.

Jordin Sparks "She Works Hard For the Money": In my mind, this is one of those songs that as an American Idol contestant you should just stay away from. As with most Donna Summer disco-era songs, they were sung so well the first time that you really can’t sing them any differently and it’s hard to infuse your own personality into them. So imagine my dismay when the producers make poor Jordin sing this song. She wasn’t horrible by any means, but it just wasn't as good as some of her better performances.

Blake Lewis "This Love": A great song choice for Blake because his voice is really reminiscent of Adam Levine’s from Maroon 5. There wasn’t much more Blake could have done with the song that Levine didn’t, but it was entertaining nonetheless.

Melinda Doolittle "Nut Bush City Limits": I loved Melinda’s attitude and spunk during this performance. Bravo to the producers for picking this obscure Ike and Tina Turner number over something more standard and bravo to Melinda for singing the hell out of this song.

Jordin Sparks "I Who Have Nothing": Damn this girl can sing! Her rendition of this song was flawless yet again (she sang it on a previous episode) and really showed us why she belongs in the competition.

Blake Lewis "When I Get You Alone": Forget what Randy said- this performance was magnificent. Another perfect song choice for Blake and he really sang the hell out of it. Here’s hoping he makes it to the finals on the strength of this great performance.

Melinda Doolittle "I’m a Woman": Of all the songs Melinda sang this year, I’m not exactly sure why she chose this one (I’m torn between "Since You’ve Been Gone" and "Home"), but it was still fun to watch her do this. It looks like she’s having tons of fun on stage and has all but wrapped up her well deserved position in the Finals.

Check back again tomorrow for my thoughts on the person sent home tonight (it's between Blake and Jordin and we all know who I want to stay).

Happy Mother's Day! Top 10 Worst Mothers

In order to celebrate Mother’s Day today, I thought I would come up with a list of some sort celebrating mothers. At first, I wanted to make one about great mothers, but I thought that would be too easy. Then I decided to come up with a list of the worst mothers from movies and TV (and even one real life example). So, if you feel like a shitty mother one day, just take a look at this list and realize you could be a lot worse.

10. Viola Fields in Monster in Law
Okay, so she’s technically a mother-in-law, but she’s still one of the most monstrous ones I have ever seen in a film. She’s mean and hilarious at the same time- a potent combination. Who but Jane Fonda could make pouring nuts into J. Lo’s gravy (she’s allergic) both psychotic and funny at the same time?

9. Mrs. Bates in Psycho
You never see her in the film, but just from the way Norman speaks about her we can understand why he is as screwed up as he is. She smothered him and virtually kept him a prisoner in his own home by not permitting any social interaction with anyone but herself. Even in death, she controls Norman’s life and makes him feel guilty for feeling an attraction towards Marion.

8. Julie Cooper-Nichol on The O.C.
Until she mellowed out a bit during the last season, Julie Cooper-Nichol was the most uncaring, unsympathetic mother around. She didn’t give a crap about her children’s happiness (trying desperately to break up Marissa and Ryan) and went off marrying and divorcing rich men because she needed the money.

7. Lilly Dillon in The Grifters
I haven’t seen this film in a couple of years, but it’s hard to forget what a terrible mother Anjelica Huston’s Lilly is to her son John Cusack. Just watch the last scene and you'll see what I mean.


6. Margaret White in Carrie
What a nutcase! Carrie’s religious whacko mom is one of the creepiest mothers around. I saw the film again last summer and I couldn’t believe how horrible she was to Carrie- locking her in closets and preaching the Bible like Robert Mitchum’s creepy minister in The Night of the Hunter.

5. Beth Jarret in Ordinary People
Unlike many of the other mother’s on this list, Beth’s horrible parenting is purely psychological as opposed to verbal or physical. Her son Conrad craves love from her, but she denies it to him throughout the whole movie and becomes a monster on par with Joan Crawford.

4. Gloria Hodge on Desperate Housewives
I wanted to like Gloria whenever she first made an appearance at Wisteria Lane because I thought Orson was such an awful person. But after a couple of episodes, we quickly realized that she is the monster in the mother-son relationship. I still remember my ultimate horror during her last episode and her near murder of Bree (my favorite housewife) and her whacking of Andrew on the head to keep him from saving her. Thank God she had that stroke and couldn’t move again.

3. Mrs. Iselin in The Manchurian Candidate
What kind of a mother would willingly allow for her son to be brainwashed and then control him through a deck of cards (and then sneak in a little incest on top of it)? Mrs. Iselin, of course, in both versions of The Manchurian Candidate. It’s especially jarring because the actresses who have played her (Angela Landsbury and Meryl Streep) are both so likeable and Mrs. Iselin definitely isn’t.

2. Catherine Roerva in A Child Called It
For anyone who has read this book, you know that she took the term “abusive mother” to the extreme toward her son who eventually wrote the book. The atrocious abuse she inflicted upon him repulsed me made me cringe. I never thought that a human being could be this relentlessly cruel, but she made me see that it has happened and may happen again.

1. Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest
Okay, you knew it was coming. The ultimate bad mother takes her well deserved position at number one. From her forcing her child to eat raw, bloody meat to waking her daughter up in the middle of the night because of wire hangers in the closet and her constant verbal abuse, the depiction of Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest (who knows if that’s what actually happened or the payback of a bitter child) is the absolute, most horrifying mother in cinematic history.

American Idol Recap

I wasn't really planning on doing a recap of American Idol this week, but at Kathryn's insistence, I will do a short recap/thoughts about Tuesday and Wednesday. In case you didn't know, LaKisha went home this week leaving me rather relieved. My Blakie was in the bottom two and it was looking like it could go either way. As much as I hate to say it, neither of them had the greatest night on Tuesday. LaKisha did "Staying Alive" first and I didn't think it was too horrible. Her second song was also okay, but nothing to really rave about. For the first time, I really couldn't stand a song of Blake's. The first one he sang was just God-awful and used way too much beatboxing. His second song was better, but not in the league of his other songs from previous weeks. Overall, it was a pretty bad week for everyone. Even Melinda and Jordin weren't at the top of their game and, in the words of Randy Jackson, weren't "in it to win it." Next week is going to have to be a ton better if any of the three want to earn the title of "American Idol" and Blake is going to have hit it out of the park (and Jordin is going to have to suck majorly) to make it to the finals with Melinda.

Dreamgirls Revisited

In the time between I first saw Dreamgirls in theaters and when I picked up my copy of the DVD last week, a lot has happened to the general opinion of the film. It went from the frontrunner for the Best Picture Oscar to being snubbed entirely in that category; my beloved Jennifer Hudson was constantly derided for her "lack of talent" in the speaking sections of her role (but she got the last laugh winning her deserved Best Supporting Actress Oscar); Eddie Murphy went from sure bet in the Best Supporting Actor category to "Let’s give it to the profane grandpa in Little Miss Sunshine" in a matter of weeks; and somehow the gay vote swung from the Beyoncé ballad "Listen" in the Best Original Song category to the average, anti-global warming anthem "I Need to Wake Up" from power lesbian Melissa Etheridge. After all of this backlash, I thought that my opinion would be swayed somewhat. Imagine my surprise when I realized that this second viewing would strengthen my opinion that it is one of the best films of 2006.

Let me just say that writer/director Bill Condon sure knows how to stage a musical number. Coming from the Fosse school of musical editing and timing, Condon turns every song into a magical, electric moment. Upon first viewing, "And I Am Telling You I’m Not Going" belongs solely to Jennifer Hudson, but now I can see Condon’s style playing a bigger part in the success of the number. Another number that surprised me in its technical proficiency is the second half of "Steppin’ to the Bad Side" in which Jimmy Early and the Dreamettes are performing the song for an audience. The style of it and the choice of editing was fairly reminiscent of the "Take Off With Us" number from Fosse’s All That Jazz.

One thing about the mauling of Dreamgirls that really irks me is the genuine disinterest in Beyoncé’s performance in the film. Sure, J. Hud, Eddie Murphy and even, to some extent, Anika Noni Rose steal the show and Beyoncé isn’t a great "actress" by any means, but the role of Deena is tailored for her. Replace The Dreams with Destiny’s Child, Effie with the three ladies kicked out of Destiny’s Child and Jamie Foxx’s Curtis with her father Mathew and you’ve got Beyoncé’s professional career. Deena isn’t a great dramatic role that requires a powerful actress in the Meryl Streep/Judi Dench vein- all that is needed is a great presence and Beyoncé definitely fits that bill. Deena is supposed to be a manufactured product, a puppet whose strings are controlled by Curtis and Beyoncé believably delivers a performance that stays true to these origins. For example, watch the scene where she has the secret meeting with John Lithgow and some other random writer to discuss an upcoming movie project. She asserts her independence, how Curtis doesn’t run every part of her life and even drops an f-bomb to throw us off. But, somehow, all of this still comes off as artificial and phony. Beyoncé is a smarter actress than most of us give her credit for and maybe Dreamgirls will be the launching pad she needs to jump start the acting career she desperately wants.

All in all, Dreamgirls is well worth your time if you love "razzle dazzle" musicals (Chicago and Moulin Rouge! could also be considered in this brand of musical) with beautiful dresses, amazing sets, tons of glitter and quite a few divas. Even if you don’t, watch it for amazing performances from Jennifer Hudson and Eddie Murphy which will continue to surprise you through out the film.

Saaphyri's Rules of Debate

1. Cut 'em down low
2. Hit 'em from the bottom of the waist
3. Cut 'em off whenever they talk
4. Make sure they don't talk back

Haha, the ladies of Charm School were in top form this week as they learned the rules of proper debate from a college debate team and then debated each other. Saaphyri was hilarious as she called the rules "stupid" and came up with the "real" rules of debate. During her debate, she cut-off Schatar repeatedly and didn't give her a chance to speak at all. Later on, when Leilene was having a mental breakdown after Larissa called her a bad mother, she quipped "Whoa, you mad ain't you?"

The best quote of the night, however, was when Mo'nique was yelling at Larissa: "Not too long ago, Mo'nique was Larissa and someone had to dig in my ass..." I want to start quoting that all the time, but it doesn't really work out of context.

Future Rants From the Number One Diva (And No Jill, Not You)

Hello dear readers! Sorry for the sporadic postings in the last week. It's been hard to find the time to write out the in-depth posts I want to. First of all, I've been catching up on older movies that I had taped while I was at school (expect some short and long rants about those). Second, yesterday I had an interview at Target and I was an offered a job there! I was so excited. Check me out as the new floor person/cashier! Third, I've been trying to read the newest Sophie Kinsella book in the "Shopaholic" series entitled Shopaholic and Baby as quickly as possible because I only have a week to finish it (long story) before I have to return it to the library. So, here are a few things you can expect in the coming weeks from me:

>After my interview yesterday, I picked up my copy of Dreamgirls (the 2-disc "Showstopper Edition" of course) and quickly watched it again last night. After seeing it again, I can't believe that it took such a beating from the critics and that fucking Babel was nominated over it at the Oscars (sorry, I can't let go). I'm planning a post about my second viewing of Dreamgirls and expect a lot of "oohs and aahs" (which Effie White don't so) about the film.

>I recently caught up on Ugly Betty and I realized just how amazing the supporting women of the show are. The ones I'm going to write about are flawless in their roles and elevate the show beyond it's "primetime soap" status.

>Ronee Blakely gave one of the greatest female performances of the 1970's in Robert Altman's Nashville as ill-fated country queen Barbara Jean, but after receiving an Oscar nomination, she vanished from existence and never rose to those heights again. Read as I chronicle this performance and the reasons she should be working again.

>Thanks to everyone who read/commented on my Oscar Bitch Fight of 1939. Expect my next one (about the men of 1939) in the near future.

American Idol Recap

Wow, last night's episode of American Idol was the best of the season. With the music of Bon Jovi as the theme, and no real "rockers" on the show, I thought it would be terrible. But, somehow, everyone did their thing and it was incredible. Here's a rundown of last night:

Phil Stacey "Blaze of Glory": Surprisingly, Phil wasn't too unbearable last night. He actually picked a good song for him and sang it decently. I still can't stand him and sincerely hope he gets the boot tonight, but it was a fine performance.

Jordin Sparks "Livin' on a Prayer": Poor Jordin. After getting praised to high-heavens last week, she went and gave the weakest performance of the episode. It wasn't Sanjaya-esque bad, it's just that the song didn't fit her voice at all and was very unflattering. Hopefully the voters forgive this tiny slipup and don't kick her off tonight.

LaKisha "This Aint a Love Song": A very good performance from LaKisha- probably my favorite of hers from the season. After so many weeks of being "blah" for me, I finally felt a little emotion from her as she sang. But that kiss with Simon was a little awkward.

Blake Lewis "You Give Love a Bad Name": OH MY GOD, BEST PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT (and maybe of the entire season). After a couple weeks of playing it safe, my Blakie finally took a chance again (as he did with the fabulous "You Don't Really Love Me" and "Time of the Season") and it paid off tremendously. I have never seen a performance like that on American Idol and I believe he actually has a better chance of winning this whole competition (the only thing that stands in his way is Melinda).

Chris Richardson "Wanted Dead or Alive": This was pretty amazing too. Very bluesy and was the perfect song to fit with Chris' voice. Chris Daughtry might have sang it last season, but Chris Richardson's version was just as good and in a totally different way.

Melinda Doolittle "Have a Nice Day": Melinda also picked the right song for her voice and sang it wonderfully. I don't really think she can be a rocker chick or anything, but she at least survived rock week and turned in another fabulous performance.

Okay, what the fuck was with George and Laura Bush speaking to the American people for donating money to causes that he should be taking care of. What a douche bag. I can't believe he has the audacity to even come on TV and do that when his administration should have fixed Louisiana after Katrina and helped with illiteracy and health care. And, George, that little joke of yours was not funny at all.