It's that time of the year again! Great year for pop music, a lot of interesting new artists this year, etc. I know you're eager to get to the list. Just a couple of quick notes:
1. This year, I decided to expand my list to include album tracks, remixes and other assorted "releases" in addition to singles. The best song last year, Selena Gomez & The Scene's "My Dilemma," wasn't eligible because it wasn't released as a single, so I decided that I needed to make a change. Why screw over something amazing just become some idiot at the record label is too dumb to release it?
2. One Direction "What Makes You Beautiful" and The Wanted "Glad You Came," both of which were big hits here in the States this year, are ineligible because they were already featured on my Best of 2011 list.
3. My eligibility cut-off is the beginning of December, so all the songs from Ke$ha's Warrior album (except "Die Young") and Swedish House Mafia "Don't You Worry Child" will have to wait until next year's list.
Enjoy!
Almost Made It: Drake featuring Lil' Wayne "HYFR (Hell Ya Fucking Right)" | Alphabeat "Love Sea" | Aiden Grimshaw "Is This Love" | Calvin Harris featuring Florence Welch "Sweet Nothing" | Saint Lou Lou "Maybe You" | Darin "Nobody Knows" | Miley Cyrus "You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go" | Foster the People "Color on the Walls (Don't Stop)" | Carly Rae Jepsen "Hurt So Good" | Lana Del Rey "Diet Mountain Dew"
50. Queen of Hearts "Shoot the Bullet"
49. Calvin Harris featuring Example "We'll Be Coming Back"
48. Samantha Jade "What You've Done to Me"
47. Justin Bieber featuring Nicki Minaj "Beauty and a Beat"
46. Robbie Williams "Candy"
45. Madonna "I'm Addicted"
44. Jessie Ware "No to Love"
43. Foster the People "Houdini"
42. Natalia Kills "Kill My Boyfriend"
41. Conor Maynard "Can't Say No"
40. Little Boots "Headphones"
39. Lawson "Taking Over Me" (The Alias Radio Edit)
38. Cheryl Cole "Under the Sun" (The Alias Radio Edit)
37. David Guetta featuring Nicky Romero & Sia "Wild One Two"
36. Ellie Goulding "Anything Could Happen"
35. Minnie-Oh "You and I"
34. Le Kid "Human Behaviour"
33. Ricki-Lee "Raining Diamonds"
32. Justin Bieber "Thought of You"
31. Karmin "Brokenhearted"
30. Kris Allen & Meiko "Loves Me Not"
29. Diana Vickers "Music to Make the Boys Cry"
28. Lana Del Rey "Ride"
27. Carly Rae Jepsen "Turn Me Up"
26. Dream Beats featuring The Face "Love Stuck"
25. Rihanna "Where Have You Been"
24. Rebecca Ferguson "Glitter & Gold" (Cahill Radio Edit)
23. Kelly Clarkson "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)"
22. Stooshe "Black Heart"
21. Taylor Swift "Red"
20. Lana Del Rey "National Anthem"
Don't you know who you're dealing with?
The video, which imagines Lana as Jackie O, is really what sold this song for me. See also: the WestFunk and Fred Falke remixes as evidence of Ms. Del Rey's versatility.
19. Loreen "Euphoria"
Forever, we sail into infinity
Another year, another stellar Eurovision entry from Sweden. And this time they won the fucker with this gutsy, almost schizophrenic track, probably the most interesting mood pop song since "Say It Right."
18. Tome Damli & Eric Saade "Imagine"
And I can't forget about you/I'd rather be lonely instead
The fact that this carefree, sunny-sounding track is actually one of the most heartbreaking, depressing songs of the year is a great reminder of how masterful the Swedish are with pop music.
17. Ke$ha "Die Young"
Young hunks, taking shots/Stripping down to dirty socks
The Glitter Trash Queen returned with what is her most mature work to date. Well, "mature" for the woman who brushes her teeth with Jack Daniels, that is.
16. One Direction "I Would"
I can't compete with your boyfriend/He's got 27 tattoos
While a few too many of Take Me Home's tracks sound like they could have been sung by other artists, "I Would" is one that only could have come from My Boys. Their vibrant personalities are all over track, elevating an already cleverly written song into the album's standout.
15. Carly Rae Jepsen "Call Me Maybe"
Hey, I just met you/And this is crazy
Deceptively simple, endlessly addictive, one of the most genius hooks in ages. Bow down to Queen Carly Rae, peons.
14. Taylor Swift "I Knew You Were Trouble"
Pretends he doesn't know that he's the reason why/You're drowning
Dismissed as "The Taylor Swift Dubstep Song," "I Knew You Were Trouble" broke Taylor's last tie to the country community and, according to some rather dim individuals, every ounce of credibility she ever had. All I have to say is: Welcome to the Pop World, Taylor.
13. Agnes "One Last Time" (Extended Remix)
I let you down/And then I woke up next to a stranger
The album version is great and probably fits the mood of Veritas better, but this (somewhat) more uptempo version somehow makes the melancholy and heartbreak that much more palpable.
12. Justin Bieber "Die In Your Arms"
There's no way that I could share you/That would break my heart to pieces
Like most male popstars, Justin Bieber wants to be the next Michael Jackson. Unlike most male popstars, Justin Bieber could actually be the next Michael Jackson. No, don't snicker at that. It's entirely true. If "Die In Your Arms" proves anything, it's that Bieber can do a smooth, midtempo love song and do it extraordinarily well.
11. Charlotte Perrelli "The Girl"
Of all the mistakes that I know I've done/Breaking your heart was the biggest one
Easily, the year's most epic chorus. The rest of the song ain't too shabby, either.
10. Girls Aloud "Something New"
We're the leaders of the pack/Tell me, can you handle that?
In the years since Girls Aloud's last album, the "girl group" has fallen on some hard times. The last Sugababes album bombed, The Saturdays have grown increasingly generic and new girl groups like Little Mix aren't even fit to carry Nadine's Tesco Club Points card . The Aloud, reuniting with Xenomania, reaffirmed their status as the greatest pop act in the world with "Something New," producing a song that introduced the "something new" pop music sorely needed by late 2012.
09. Cheryl Cole "Call My Name"
I love you too much to let go
The moment my love for Calvin Harris became heart-racingly, like-a-punch-in-the-gut real.
08. Dragonette "Let It Go"
We don't need a cure for the weight of the world
Very rarely do I ever love a song on first listen. But the moment I heard "Let It Go" on the band's SoundCloud page, I was so enamored by this rapturous, pulsing beat that I had to listen to it over and over and over again. Dragonette are often hit or miss for me, but I would hit this song all night long if I could.
07. Avicii "Levels"
Oh, oh, sometimes, I get a good feeling
Given the fact that one 2012 hit sampled it (Flo Rida's "Good Times") and another outright ripped it off (Ke$ha's "Die Young"), "Levels" feels more and more like one of the most important songs of the year.
06. Nicki Minaj "Starships"
But fuck who you want and fuck who you like
The moment when Nicki Minaj either jumped the shark or became reborn as the most atypical, genre-bending popstar around. Obviously, I believe the latter.
05. Justin Bieber "Boyfriend"
I can take you places you ain't never been before
Ten months later and "Boyfriend" is just as clever--both as a single choice and as a song itself--as it was back when it was released.
04. One Direction "One Thing"
Something's gotta give now/'Cause I'm dying just to know your name
To the unconvinced, "One Thing" is teen pop tripe, a generic song that can't even be bothered to come up with something more creative than "You've got that one thing" as its hook. But, in its own way, "One Thing" is a tribute to the boyband songs of yesterday, when times and pop hooks were much simpler. The lyrics may read inane on paper but they reveal a level of depth and longing few songs can muster.
03. Florence + The Machine "Spectrum (Say My Name)" (Calvin Harris Remix)
We are shining/And we will never be afraid again
I've always admired Florence Welch far more than I liked her music ("Dog Days Are Over" and "Shake It Out" notwithstanding). But the moment I heard her wail, "Say my naaaaaaaame!" like a drugged up acid queen over that Calvin Harris beat, I knew that Florence and I would get along just fine.
02. Lana Del Rey "Off to the Races"
I'm your little scarlet starlet/Singing in the garden
Everything a pop song should be but so rarely is: moody, mysterious, lush, yet ever so fragile. A popstar is born.
01. Demi Lovato "Give Your Heart a Break"
You try to smile it away/Some things you can't disguise
Before Miley and Selena eventually caught up to her, Demi was the be all and end all of the Disney pop princesses. Her 2009 album Here We Go Again was a mature-beyond-her-years masterwork which proved (to me, if no one else) that, hey, maybe these Disney kids were on to something. In the three years since that album, I have been a huge supporter of Demi, eagerly awaiting her big mainstream breakthrough. After a rough year for her in her personal life, Demi, almost out of nowhere, achieved just that with "Give Your Heart a Break." Picking up on my favorite trend of 2012, "Give Your Heart a Break" sounds like a light, summery pop song but is actually quite melancholic when you dig beneath the surface. A beautiful, sad love story pours out of Demi about a guy who has been damaged by past relationships and a girl desperately trying to convince him to take a chance on her. "Give Your Heart a Break" wasn't the first time Demi proved that she could hang with the Katy Perrys and Rihannas of the pop world, but it's certainly the most convincing argument that the rest of the world has finally figured this out, too.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Imaginary Boyfriends of 2012
Past Imaginary Boyfriends countdowns: 2011 2010 2009 2008
Justin Bieber
Somewhere between 2011 and 2012, The Biebz grew up and became the heir apparent to Justin Timberlake's throne as the King of Bringing SexyBack. His voice got deeper, his music grew up and his body...well, he's not the underage twink he was a mere twelve months ago.
Siwon Choi
While everyone was going nuts over Korean popstar PSY's crossover hit "Gangnam Style," the Korean who got my kimchee fermenting was actor/boyband member Siwon Choi. He's just pretty, isn't he? 
Tom Daley
Somehow, even in the year that brought us Channing Tatum and company shaking their thong-covered asses in Magic Mike, Tom Daley managed to be the most gratuitously naked celebrity around. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. If I had a six-pack like that, I wouldn't wear a shirt either.
Drake
Nicki Minaj once rapped, obviously referring to Drake, "He just gotta give me that look, then the panties coming off, off." Put on his "Back That Thing Up"-sampling "Practice" in the background and not only will my panties be off, but I'll be on my back before you can say, "Mazel tov."
John Garfield
I've always known that John Garfield is sexy. I mean, I have eyes. But after a recent viewing spree of his movies--including the glorious boxing drama Body and Soul--it really hit home just how damn attractive he was. There's something about a guy who hates everyone and will probably openly sneer at you on your first meeting that speaks to me.
Jeremy Irvine
I sat through War Horse for this pretty, pretty man. And while that film wasn't as horrible as I imagined it would be, Jeremy was certainly reason enough to stick it through.
Logan Lerman
Let's just say that I wasn't mad when he briefly appeared in a gold bikini during one scene of Perks of Being a Wallflower.
Ryan Lochte
As Grace Adler said on an episode of Will & Grace about a gorgeous but not-so-bright date, "Not smart. Doesn't need to be." 
Chris Messina
This tweet I wrote during an episode of The Mindy Project says it all:
One Direction
(Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson)
Last year, Zayn Malik, with his beautiful face and all-around dreaminess, made it on this list by himself. This year, the year in which One Direction took over both America and my life, I must include all of My Boys here. Unlike any other boyband, past or present, I love each of them so much and for such completely different reasons. To quote my screenplay: "I'm waiting for a man who has all the best features of the One Direction boys: Louis's wit, Harry's dimples, Niall's innocence, Liam's seriousness and Zayn's dreaminess. Sigh."
Evan Peters
After a few episodes, I realized that American Horror Story: Asylum wasn't for me. But when, in the first few minutes I was acquainted with him, Evan Peters appeared completely nude, I knew that he was definitely for me.
Cody Rhodes
My dream is still to be the Miss Elizabeth to his Randy Savage.
Tim Tebow
Everyone's favorite virgin (we're giving up on the idea that Nick Jonas is still one, right?) finally gave us a reason to care about football. Straight guys hate him because apparently he's not a very good player. I could care less because who gives a shit about talent when he has muscles like that?
Teen Wolf Boys
(Colton Haynes, Tyler Hoechlin, Dylan O'Brien, Tyler Posey & Daniel Sharman)
As much as the One Direction boys, there is something for everyone among the cast of MTV's best show since Daria. You want a cute puppy dog who is the ideal boyfriend to most teen girls? Tyler Posey is your man. How about a rude, sneering jerk who is actually quite vulnerable underneath his standoffish exterior? Colton Haynes fits that bill. A ripped guy who doesn't like to cuddle and just wants to fuck? Calling Tyler Hoechlin. An adorable, emotionally damaged boy? I've got Daniel Sharman for you. Or, what about a cute guy who just happens to have a sarcastic sense of humor and a quip for every moment? Well, Dylan O'Brien is mine, so you're on your own with that one.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
In What Direction Will One Direction Go?
I spend a lot of time thinking about One Direction. Too much, perhaps, if you talk to some people. Due to the fact that their second album--the winkingly-titled Take Me Home--was released a couple weeks ago, and the influx of promotion they've done for this album, I've spent a bit more time than usual obsessing over My Boys. I was extremely curious about how One Direction would follow up their mega successful debut album and reassert themselves as the best boyband in the world, but, if anything, Take Me Home left me with more far more questions than answers.
First, let's get this out of the way: Take Me Home isn't as good as Up All Night. Not by a long shot. To be fair, though, this was a nearly insurmountable task from day one. While Up All Night isn't an album I would openly recommend to people who aren't already pop music fans (and even with some fans I'd be leery), it certainly fulfilled any hopes and wishes I had for the album after hearing "What Makes You Beautiful." Aside from a couple of dud ballads (I'm looking at you "More Than This" and "Moments"), Up All Night was filled with top-notch tunes, brimming with exuberance, personality and catchy hooks galore. The music was nothing but pure, instantaneous joy, the group a happy respite from scores of popstars who appear to find the whole exercise a bore until they can make something "real."
Take Me Home isn't a bad album. Far from it, actually. While it lacks a lot of the dazzle and panache of Up All Night, a few of the tracks are immediate stand-outs. "I Would," written by three members of fellow British "boyband" (they play guitars, hence the quotes, but have a good sense of humor) McFly, is the album's highlight. Via clever wordplay, "I Would" is a track that matches the exaltation of the first album while simultaneously pushing them in a more mature direction. "She's Not Afraid" also pushes into my favorite subgenre of 2012: the upbeat pop track superficially masking deep melancholy. "She's not afraid of all the attention/She's not afraid of running wild/How come she's so afraid of falling in love?" the boys, in full-on crisis mode, wail over the chorus. Future third single "Kiss You" and "C'mon C'mon" are also great tracks, but I'm a bit more hesitant in my praise for them, mainly because of how generic they sound. Sure, they are catchy and bouncy, but could they really come up with nothing other than repeating "Yeah!" in the chorus of both songs?
This a problem that plagues a lot of Take Me Home. While they never reach the generic depths of The Saturdays' recent output or Rita "I'm Not Rihanna!" Ora, the songs are a lot less personality driven this go-around. "Rock Me," which, from the beginning sounds like a "We Will Rock You" ripoff, was written and produced by Dr. Luke, but you probably wouldn't be wrong in assuming that it only fell in One Direction's lap after Maroon 5 and Katy Perry turned it down. The ballads are even more dire, mediocre at their best, snoozeworthy at their worst, and full of tiresome declarations of love to nonexistent girls. Perhaps the most frustrating thing about Take Me Home is that you can hear the boys trying to mature their sound, whether through acoustic songs or darker, heavier stylization, but none of it really quite comes together.
All of this really leads to one more question: where will the third album take the boys? Album three is the typical time when teen popstars must begin their transition into adulthood. Miley Cyrus transitioned too suddenly and alienated her fan base, no matter how brilliant the material actually was. The Biebz did it well this year while scoring the biggest hits of his career. One fears that album three will be more Ed Sheeran crap like "Little Things" which has now become their second #1 in the UK. Sheeran is not terrible in and of himself--I think "You Need Me, I Don't Need You" is a nice tune--but what he represents makes my skin crawl: "real" music about "real" things like relationships and heartbreak, drowning in acoustic guitar soul and downbeatness as if that's the only way to make "authentic" music. "Little Things" is such utter shit, I can't believe that it not only hit #1 but that anyone on the planet thought this meandering fart of a tune that goes absolutely nowhere musically (seriously, does anyone know what dynamics are or does singing everything at the same middle-of-the-road dynamic make the song more authentic?) would be a great single choice. My fourth biggest fear in life now--after spiders, being sold into illegal slavery and being forced to move back in with my parents--is that One Direction will ditch their pop sound completely and become slaves to this awful acoustic sound. The group already has two boys for this: Harry is already practically dating Ed Sheeran at this point and Niall always has a guitar with him. Liam is a wild card; he could really go either way. Possibly in favor of a more poppy sound, howevver, we have Louis, who is too sassy for acoustic crap but I seem to recall him saying his favorite song on Up All Night was one of the crap ballads, and Zayn, who likes (ugh) Chris Brown and whose voice is more suited towards pop/R&B. Take Me Home tries to accommodate everyone but struggles to find a meaningful synthesis of all the boys' musical influences, preferences and stylings. Album three will have to try much harder in this regard. But, who knows. Maybe in two years the acoustic stuff will have evolved, to use Taylor Swift as an example, from "Teardrops on My Guitar" to "Back to December." Until then, the boys can take me home any day of the week. Oh, come on, you knew that pun was coming at some point.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Queer Anglo Films, Take #4: My Beautiful Laundrette
After a longer-than-we-intended haitus, Dave and I are back to discuss another film in our Queer Anglo Films series. We're looking at all things queer in British cinema, but today's entry, My Beautiful Laundrette, is perhaps more famous for another reason: the breakthrough performance from Daniel Day-Lewis, which, coupled with his turn in the same year's A Room With a View, showed him to be one of the most versatile actors around. But, as we discuss further, My Beautiful Laundrette is surprisingly complex and layered film, much more so than I recalled before this rewatch.
James: For 25 years, the gays have claimed
Stephen Frears' My Beautiful Laundrette as one of "their" films. But I'm
about to make a statement that will no doubt ruffle some feathers (and
in case GLAAD becomes outraged, just remember that they publicly
endorsed I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry): it's time to, if not
outright give it back, then at least relinquish some of the control.
Sure, on its surface, Laundrette acts and feels like a queer film, and
it even takes some twists and turns that set it apart from many others
in that genre made around the same time. For such a small film, however,
My Beautiful Laundrette tackles some heavy themes--including racism,
alienation and the class divide in Britain--in addition to the already
taboo homosexuality issue. There's a lot to chew on here and not all of
it relates to the main couple, a rarity among gay-themed films then AND
now.
To me, My Beautiful Laundrette is a film about the divide
between the old and the new generation, the working class and the
college educated, British and Pakistani traditions, conservatism and
radicalism, the immigrant dream and the disillusionment of the new land.
Among these, though, the most obvious divide is that between Omar and
Johnny. Looking at them, you'd never be able to tell that they were a
couple and you'd be hard-pressed to come up with any commonalities in
background, temperament, ambition or personality. So why are they 'd
together? Like a lot of issues in My Beautiful Laundrette, it's probably
a tad more complicated than the surface (opposites attract!) appears.
There's an element of power in their relationship that mirrors and
inverts what is going on around them culturally speaking. There's a
scene in the film where, after a fight, Johnny leaves Omar and the
laundrette to go to some party with his punk friends. When Omar goes to
bring him back, he doesn't try to woo him back with declarations of love
and how lost he be without him. Instead, he, rather cruelly,
reiterates his superiority over Johnny, how he, as a Pakistani, is his
boss and Johnny must listen to him. The fact that he uses this tactic is
curious, but even more curious is the fact that this is what makes
Johnny come back. What is it about Omar that makes the usually defiant
Johnny submit so willfully? Is it only because he loves him or is he
also atoning for his past sins as a radical, anti-immigrant punk? To
director Stephen Frears' credit, he only hints at these possible
motivations, shading what otherwise could have been a fairly typical
love story.
There are a vast amount of topics we could cover with
this film, so I'm curious where you want to take this, Dave. What else
did you find unusual about the Omar/Johnny relationship?
Dave: I don’t really think that anyone need
relinquish anything – as you go on to suggest, the claims to the themes
this film deals with are multitudinous, but surely it speaks of the
immense, lasting quality of the film that several groups of marginalised
people would want to have some sort of ownership over it. At the time
of its release, I imagine the homosexual aspect was so revolutionary
that it overrode the interests of heterosexual Pakistanis; nowadays, I’d
hope they view it with a similar fondness for its depiction of their
existence in urban Britain during the ‘80s. A few years ago, I read a
novel by Hanif Kureishi, who wrote the screenplay here, and its mixture
of racial and sexual complications was strikingly similar. So I think
there was a certain underground culture, not merely comprised of gays,
who would have appreciated and ‘claimed’ this film as representing their
lives. The remarkably blasé depiction of an interracial homosexual
relationship always suggested to me that the film was playing to a more
general audience who were opposed to the Thatcherite political scene at
the time.
But, given the series we’re looking at this as part of,
we should indeed focus on the homosexual aspects – while having
recognised the value of the other aspects of the film. I’d definitely
agree that there’s a strange power dynamic between the two of them. I
think that moment speaks of the strange friction in the wider society
between Thatcher’s ideals and the general racism of the time – the fact
that Pakistani immigrants were the major group flourishing under her
rule is a wonderfully ironic fact. Johnny should be the more powerful of
the two – and he certainly seems to be the one who takes the initiative
in their sexual relationship – but the system has undone him. But I
also think that, for Johnny, work isn’t something he particularly values
at all. He does want to get his life back ‘on track’ and knows that to
do so, he has to work. But, as he suggests when he says, “Just to get us
through, Omo,” it’s so that, in some not impossible world where he and
Omar can be together, they’ll need money. So he’s happy and willing to
do grunt work not because it will bring him money, but because it’ll
help the business grow and support them.
I think this optimism
is a huge part of what keeps My Beautiful Laundrette feeling so fresh
even today. It’s strangely ahead of its time, because it’s not utopian
or naïve at all – there is obvious homophobia in the community, from the
punks and from the older generation, but from Omar and Johnny’s
perspective, these are minor concerns. They constantly tease other
people with veiled references to their relationship – “In my experience, it’s always worth waitin’ for Omo” – and then there’s wonderful little
moments like Johnny licking Omar’s neck in broad daylight. When Tania
leaves, I think it’s because she’s disappointed in herself for expecting
such a conventional union as that between her and Omar. (Tania is also
part of an aspect we’ve not touched on yet – the marginalisation of
females. Where does acceptance of homosexuality leave the already
oppressed females?) What do you make of the thin boundaries between Omar
and Johnny’s homosexual and homosocial relationships? It’s a dangerous
game they play, but it also seems rather fun.
James: I was impressed with the way Omar and
Johnny's relationship was presented in Laundrette. Obviously, they
couldn't be as open with their homosexuality as two West Hollywood gays
can be now. But there were many instances where they felt winkingly
defiant towards their oppressors. My favorite is when Omar invites
Johnny over to his uncle's house. Tania is at the door greeting them
when Omar suddenly reaches for Johnny's face. He reveals that he's only
removing an eyelash, laughing at both Johnny's slight wince and Tania's
surprise expression. Omar does this with such flourish and, for lack of a
better word, swagger, he's almost begging for Tania to say something.
Framed in a three shot, we can see that Tania is slowly understanding
Johnny and Omar's relationship, even if she doesn't want to come out and
admit it. And this is what so great about their relationship: they hint
and tease it to nearly everyone in the film but only enough so eyebrows
that are raised, not so anyone actually comes out and asks them. They
have fun making others squirm, yet they know their limitations. One
wrong move could kill their laundrette and any dreams they have for it.
Speaking
of Tania, I found her to be one of the most fascinating characters in
the entire film. As a woman in Pakistani culture, she is as oppressed,
if not more so, than the homosexual Omar. At least he has the luxury of
being able to "hide" his "condition" whenever he wants (or needs to).
But Tania has a bit of a rebellious streak in her, as evidenced by her
going topless outside the window where Omar is trying to have a serious
conversation with his uncle. Branching off from what you said, and this
may be me reading way too much into the film, I felt like Tania was at
first elated that Omar wasn't a "conventional" suitor. Perhaps she felt
that having a homosexual as a husband would give her the freedom to
break away from the woman's traditional role in Pakistani culture. She
clearly wants her independence, and Omar is probably the first guy she
has met who may be able to offer it. But, as she sees Omar becoming more
and more like an American yuppie, concerned mostly with making a good
impression and being a professional, we start to see her rebelliousness
act up even more. She starts to see that whatever benefits she thought
she would get by marrying Omar may not happen. And she'll be damned if
she'll end up like her own mother, an oppressed housewife stuck with a
husband who openly has an affair with another (white!) woman.
When
you ask where the acceptance of homosexuality leaves oppressed females,
my mind quickly went to how homosexuals of each gender are presented
"in the media." Even among homosexuals, who are supposed to be all in
this together (yes, I just quoted High School Musical), men's issues
about coming out, finding relationships, staying in relationships are
given far more weight in films and TV than women's. And in terms of
exposure, forget about it. Turn on nearly any TV show and you'll see a
gay man (the fact that he's often playing the sassy friend to the
straight, white female lead is for another conversation). Off the top of
my head, I can think of only two American shows that feature a lesbian
character at all (Pretty Little Liars and Glee). It may be even worse in
film, where gay films about gay men are always the Talk of the Town,
while films with lesbians are either straight male fantasies (Johansson
and Cruz making out in Vicky Cristina Barcelona) or condescending looks
at women who are "turned" straight (The Kids Are All Right). Contrary to what
Beyonce claims, men still run the world and we can still feel
it in 2012. So it's not just a problem in the world of My Beautiful
Laundrette; women are marginalized everyday, even in an "accepting" gay
culture.
Dave: I think you're right about to some extent about Tania. She certainly
disparages the idea of the family unit, and the silent ghost of her own
mother moving around in the background of shots is hardly an ideal to
look up to. But the (only?) other model of womanhood around is Rachel - a
woman with some nice coats, sure, but also willingly entrapping herself
within an affair that can never develop beyond that - and Tania
dislikes her because of the pain her mother quietly suffers. "Everything
is waiting for you," Rachel tells Tania at one point, but with these
options of womanhood, what is waiting for Tania? I didn't really sense
any of that elation, because Omar and Johnny's homosexuality is another
door shutting on Tania's escape attempt. Finally, she takes her leave
in plain sight, on one of the trains winding through the city. Tania
definitely reflects the continued neglect of women that you went on
to describe - their spaces are still off-screen, undefined, and
unexplored. Tania doesn't even leave so much as simply vanish.
So
I don't think My Beautiful Laundrette is eschewing presenting the
ongoing problems and oppressions in this society, but in such a
troubled, politically violent time, the winsome note of optimism it ends
on was obviously carefully chosen and hits the right note without being
naive or inappropriate. The feeling of an innocent childishness to the
moment is clearly fleeting, something that can only exist behind closed
doors; so perhaps the playful erotic edge to it is fleeting too, and
maybe there's a tinge of sadness as the door closes, with the
recognition that the door has to close on this lovely scene. With the
faded intellectual glories of Omar's father, the hollow business
ventures of Nasser, and the oppressive mutedness of Tania's mother, the
purest happiness seems to remain in childhood, and I think the ending
captures that bittersweet realisation. My Beautiful Laundrette never
makes Jonny's Nazi-punk figures of real terror in the narrative, and I
think that more optimistic approach makes the film more distinct
because it can express a genuine homosexual entanglement without it
being defined by its wrongness. And that's surely an argument for
keeping the queer claim on the film.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Rants on The Perks of Being a Wallflower
The long awaited film adaptation of The Perks of Being a Wallflower--written and directed by the novel's author Stephen Chbosky--is a lot like an ABBA greatest hits collection. Sure, you're getting all the highlights of a fantastic career which includes the massive moments like "Dancing Queen" and "The Winner Takes It All" that made them the best pop group of all time. With a greatest hits package, however, you're only getting brief snippets of what made them so special in the first place. The highs may indeed be high, but you're missing all the subtleties and so-called "minor" moments ("As Good As New" or "Disillusion" in ABBA's case) that complete the portrait.
This is the problem that plagues Perks (and most adaptations of beloved books, actually). How do you condense a great novel into 100 minutes while retaining the tone and idiosyncrasies that made the novel work in the first place? Perks introduces a lot of the novel's various subplots but they fail to cohere, sometimes landing with a thud but mostly reeking with the feeling that it could have been handled better. One of my favorite scenes in the book is the Christmas party where the group finds out who their Secret Santas are. Charlie has bought additional gifts for everyone, gifts so thoughtful and spot on, the others realize just how much Charlie absorbs and understands about them. It's a moving moment in a book, one that deepens and solidifies what they all saw in Charlie in the first place. In the movie, though, the moment makes an appearance but doesn't hit the emotional level it could have. A lot of what is ultimately transferred from the novel are the typical, almost pandering, themes that fill most high school dramas ("Why don't I fit in?", "Who am I really?", "I can't wait to live life in the real world," "What is love?", etc.), encapsulated in almost infuriatingly simplistic catchphrases about the sadness and pain of falling in and out of love.
Thanks heavens, then, for Logan Lerman in the role of Charlie. I have heard a lot about Lerman over the past few years, but I've never had the occasion to see him in anything. Obviously, I've been missing out. First of all, his voice sounds exactly like my beloved Zac Efron's, so that was a wonderfully superficial introduction to him. Unlike Zefron in a superficially similar film like Charlie St. Cloud, however, Lerman pushes hard to make his Charlie an awkward kid with genuine social issues instead of a lovable misfit who just can't seem to connect with people. He colors in the broadly-drawn lines of the film with an emotional depth and clarity the rest of Perks lacks. Lerman's warm, expressive face has the ability to suggest both emotional tragedy and comedic lightness, often times simultaneously, without overselling either of them. He captures the opposite-sounding warm melancholic tone that is the film's strongest selling point, only punctuating the fact that 95 percent of the time Charlie is a regular fourteen year old kid with sharp pain.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
100 Hot Men and a Dame: #67 John Cena
67. John Cena
Occupation: Wrestler
Nationality: American
Age: 35
Best Known For: Rising through the ranks of the WWE, winning countless championships and becoming the company's figurehead: the Hulk Hogan of 2000s, if you will.
You may have noticed on my Twitter feed that I've been going through a wrestling phase of late, so what better time to whip out this conversation with my friend and fellow wrestling-watcher Jakey (follow him on Twitter and read his hilarious blog) about wrestler John Cena.
Dame James: When did you first encounter John and, if it wasn't love at first sight, when did you fall in love with him?
Jakey: I was first introduced to John Cena the way many wrestling fans were -- on an June 2002 episode of WWF Smackdown, he made his debut as an earnest wrestler accepting an open challenge by Kurt Angle, citing his motivation as "ruthless aggression" (a phrase that Vince McMahon had uttered on the previous episode of Monday Night Raw). At the risk of being defensive, I would like to add that I knew this from the top of my head and did not look anything up. I had also seen his picture in Pro Wrestling Illustrated magazine when he was in developmental wrestling under the name Prototype.
This all being said, he didn't immediately pique my interest. Obviously he was good-looking -- fresh-faced and impossibly chiseled -- but he didn't strike my fancy the way that another debut that year (Randy Orton) would. The quintessential pretty boy, Orton later worked very hard to destroy that image, maybe even too hard -- his in-ring work spoke for itself, but he has since coated his entire upper body in tattoos.
I think I first felt tingly feelings for Cena when I saw him live for the first time, at a September 2002 taping of Smackdown (which is a somewhat famous episode as it is known for the night that Brock Lesnar broke Hardcore Holly's neck, and when the Billy and Chuck wedding never happened. Nothing like being a 16-year-old gay boy in an audience shouting "FA****!"). While Cena would later segue into his "thug" gimmick, at the time he was a generic babyface, but he would always do a special thing to spice up his outfit: His trunks would always match the local sports team. For example, in North Carolina he would always wear baby blue (ADORABLE). In Minnesota, he wore purple and gold.
This all being said, I really don't think that I became a fan of his until further along in his run. The more I read about him, the more I admired his work ethic, and there were few times in the past decade more facinating than the era in which he was booked as a babyface ("good guy" for those of you not familiar with the lingo), but constantly booed by the audience (often with Cena, the dynamic is that women and children cheer him but men boo him). Honestly, most of the time when I watch him wrestle, it's still the work that impresses me, not the ridiculous musculature.
Your knowledge of wrestling always surprises me, so when did you first come accustomed to Cena?
DJ: In high school, I was a casual watcher of wrestling, meaning I would watch Raw or Smackdown for a couple weeks in a row and then not at all for months. Honestly, I would mainly watch for the hot guys as it was the closest thing to porn I had. I have no idea the exact date I first encountered John Cena, but I believe he was involved in some tournament to get a shot at the WWE Championship. He was the heel (aka the villain) at this point, cheating his way into the match for the belt, which was a huge turn-on for me. I think I've mentioned this before, but I've always had a soft spot for the villains, particularly in cartoons and wrestling. When I was growing up, I was probably the only person who preferred Scar and Jafar over Simba and Aladdin. It was the same with wrestling: growing up, instead of cheering on Hulk Hogan or Bret Hart (barf), I always liked Shawn Michaels, who, at that point, was a vain, self-centered wrestler who had awesome entrance music and the amazing Sensational Sherri as his valet. So, when I saw the gorgeous, incredibly well built Cena being a major asshole, my heart went a-flutter.
It's interesting that you mention Randy Orton because they
both appear, to this casual observer, like the face of the company but
they represent such wildly different ends of the personality spectrum.
Randy is kind of like the dark, dangerous bad boy, with his tatted up
body and sarcastic sneer. John, on the other hand, is the golden child,
the eternal hero we're supposed to cheer on no matter what. Who would
have guessed that back in 2004 or so when he was still a heel?
Confession time: I don't know if I've ever admitted this, but I have a soft spot for attractive wiggers, or white people who dress "black." There's something about it that I've never been able to put my finger on, but a built guy like John Cena wearing throwback jerseys and baggy shorts really turned me on. And how could I forget the freestyle raps! I doubt he does this anymore, but he used to come out and do these dumb little raps to insult whatever wrestler he was in a feud with. They were hit or miss, but the assholian-ness of them really spoke to me.
J: John unfortunately doesn't do the raps anymore, and his
promos (save for his most recent battle with C.M. Punk) are often
overly scripted and cutesy, especially once WWE switched to a more "PG"
feel. That being said, his gangsta-rapping is what saved his career --
he was on a bus doing it for Stephanie McMahon and she brought it to
the writers' attention. Before that he was a bland heel with no angle
or charisma and was probably going to be released.
I
do think I realized his sex appeal once he started doing the "gangsta"
gimmick. The white muscle-shirt! the silver chain! His fearlessness on
the mike!
What has your opinion been of him as a wrestler?
DJ: I've heard for years of people complaining that John is a limited wrestler because he only knows how to do five moves. Um, what? Have they ever watched him in the ring? I think people confuse using the same moves in every match to not having a large repertoire. Would these same people accuse Ric Flair or Bret Hart, both of whom had well known routines they used in nearly ever single match of their careers, of being limited? Probably not. I won't argue that not-so-good wrestlers can be famous for periods of time; it's the same thing that happens with certain actors who are in high demand for a short period of time. But eventually their lack of talent shows and they fade away. You don't stay at the top for as long as John has without having any ability.
Here's the caveat about Cena's in-ring ability: He's not an aerial wrestler, he's not a great technician in the vein of Malenko, Jericho, Bret Hart, et al. But he understands the showmanship of wrestling. He's 100% genuine every time he goes out there, and he's stayed on top mainly because of his outstanding work ethic. Guy works every house show, is always on the main event, does all the promotional work as well as his own charity work, the latter of which he's humbly modest about it and usually doesn't like it addressed on television. He was much sexier as a heel, but WWE will never turn him heel because he's their top merchandise seller.
DJ: Leave it to the WWE, like Hollywood, to take an angle that worked so well and then completely water it down for the sake of appealing to the kiddies. I understand why they do it, but it's always so disappointing. Hopefully, one day in the future they'll need to reinvigorate his image and they will turn him bad again. You can't stay the good guy forever.
Showmanship is a rare gift that not ever wrestler possesses. Many people who complain about John don't understand how vital it is. You can be the greatest technician ever, but if the audience isn't interested in you, you won't get very far. I tend to equate wrestlers with movie actors because not only is it a more familiar concept to my readers, but they also have a surprisingly lot in common. John Cena is a lot like Julia Roberts. You'd never argue that Julia Roberts is a technical actress in the same way that Cate Blanchett is. But Julia Roberts possesses the ability to light the up the screen whenever she's on camera. Whether or not she's any good doesn't matter; she has that certain "it" factor very few people are born with. It's the same with John. He may not be able to compete at a technical level, but he always radiates star power whenever he steps into the ring.
J: And now for some shallow talk: Are you necessarily a fan of muscles? I feel like we're in that scene from Clueless
when Dionne says the waiter is "puny, I like 'em big", Cher says "Ew, I
hate muscles" and Tai says "I don't mind either way, as long as their
you-know-what isn't crooked." Are you a Cher or a Dionne in this
scenario? This is hard to talk about without sounding like we're on
some muscle-worship fetish site, but being a very svelte man and having
gone to college in Wisconsin surrounded by farm boys, I do consider
myself weak in the knees for a pair of big biceps. I don't watch
wrestling for the homoertocism of it, but damn if I don't think something when John Cena counters a cross-body by hurling his opponent up over his shoulders with one arm.DJ: I'm more of a Dionne. When it comes to muscles, I'm mainly about if it looks right on a man's body. Like, the typical "juicehead gorillas" the girls from Jersey Shore fall in love with are often too big and that just doesn't look right or appeal to me. But John has the right proportion of muscles and it works (boy, does it work!). If he can pick up some of those 500 pound monsters with no problem, think of how much he could toss me around! Sigh, a boy can dream.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
100 Hot Men and a Dame: #72 Dean Stockwell
72. Dean Stockwell
Occupation: Actor
Nationality: American
Peak of Hotness: The late 1950s through the mid-1960s
Best Known For: Child actor at MGM who made the transition into adulthood with Long Day's Journey Into Night then into a character actor in Paris, Texas and Blue Velvet.
Will, a fellow Stockwell enthusiast, joins me once again to help me discuss this rarely discussed acting legend.
Dame James: When did you first encounter Dean and, if it wasn't love at first sight, when did you fall in love with him?
Will: I'm sure I saw him guesting on some television show in the '90s, but the first time I remember him making an impression was in Paris, Texas. I think he's a pretty fantastic, under appreciated character actor (which you can also see in something like his WEIRD turn in Blue Velvet), but I wouldn't say I fell in love with him until I saw him in Long Day's Journey Into Night. He's not a horrible looking older guy, but he pretty much checks every box in Long Day's Journey. He's sad and thin and romantic in a tragic sense.
It's like Simon Amstell says, "Thin and ill looking is my type. I like the idea I could go on a date with him and it could be his last."
Plus, it must be said, he-like me-has a strong brow line, and I love that. The only person we have today who comes close in that department is Dave Franco.
I wanted to weigh in on him basically based on my love of him in Long Day's Journey. I'm a little embarrassed to say I haven't seen a ton else of the movies he made when he was younger, so I was curious about his other roles. I know you have an affection for him doing a more rakish character in Sons and Lovers. You seem to have more of an appetite for 1950s melodrama than I, which is what he worked in a lot back then.
DJ: Make that another for Long Day's Journey Into Night. I'm pretty sure I saw that early on in my movie infancy, but Dean's prettiness made quite a vivid impression on me. I love that Simon Amstell quote you use because it's so true, and Dean fits that bill so well in Long Day's Journey. With each terrible cough, he becomes that much more pathetic, and that, for whatever reason, only makes him that much more attractive. Plus, we can't discount the fact that he's playing an Emotionally Damaged Boy, another strange turn-on in my world. With a drug addict mother and a cold, uncaring father, Dean's character is screwed up only in a way I could love.
I haven't seen much of his early work either, actually. He was a child actor in the late 40s and 50s who was one of the lucky ones to transition into adult roles. Apparently, I've seen him in Gentleman's Agreement, where, I'm guessing, he played Gregory Peck's son. Yeah, that one left a vivid impression. Sons and Lovers was great because it played up his sexiness without turning him into a dumbass beefcake, which he clearly wasn't. He plays an intelligent, sensitive guy, who just happens to be really, really horny. Clearly, this was an ideal movie for me as he was not only working his sexiness but he was also at the peak of his prettiness.
 |
| Stockwell in heat in Sons and Lovers |
I saw Compulsion years ago and I remember liking him a lot in that. He plays one half of a Loepold & Loeb-esque duo who are on trial for murder. I remember lots of homoeroticism, especially on Dean's part, which is always a plus for me. Even if you aren't as into 1950s melodrama as I am, you may want to check it out for that. And this leads me to my next question: Dean Stockwell (and his eyebrows) asks you to help him murder someone. In exchange, he'll have sex with you just one glorious time. Do you do it?
W: A pretty, young, AND evil Dean Stockwell? Be still my heart. What else could I say to that proposition but yes?
I had never heard of Compulsion, but all the clips I just looked up from it seem to indicate his character is the bottom in that relationship. Also, it looks like there are extremely long sequences of a halfway-to-Paul-Masson-champagne-commercials Orson Welles delivering court room speeches. I'll have to look it up. Thanks for the recommendation!
DJ: What can I say, I'm a giver.
W: It's a little weird to be talking about the hotness of an actor who is now, like, 75 years old, I must admit. But, If I can bring it up for a second, I wanted to touch on what a strange and interesting career he's managed to carve out for himself. As he got older, he didn't exactly age into a conventionally attractive leading man. That's sad for us, but I think it might have served his career a lot better. He became, ostensibly, a character actor (or as close as you can really be with two Cannes Best Actor prizes under your belt). Rather than getting left behind when the type of actor Hollywood became interested in changed in the late 60s, it seems like he got more and more comfortable subverting audience expectations of a former contracted kid actor from the old studio system. I mean, how many of the hot pieces of unattainable ass you're profiling in this series ever had the balls to go as weird as Stockwell did in something like, say, Blue Velvet?
Can you imagine a current kid actor in transition like Logan Lerman running towards the camera while screaming The Lord's Prayer in Pig Latin for David Lynch in 30 years? I'm sure we can both imagine Logan Lerman doing many things, but I'm not sure about that one.
DJ: His career was certainly a wild ride, starting at MGM and ending up with Wim Wenders and David Lynch. I think it was to his benefit that his period of sexiness was so brief and so early in his career. Hollywood doesn't like pretty character actors and he never would have gotten a chance to thrive as one if he had remained a pretty boy into his 40s. And I say good on him for taking advantage of this. Look, as you have seen and will see in this countdown, prettiness doesn't last forever. It's great to take advantage of it while you have it, but you can't bank on it forever. Dean was one of the smart ones who said, "I won't be a leading anymore. Fuck it. Now is the time to do whatever I want." Looking through my list, the only other actor who even comes close to Dean's career trajectory is Jean-Pierre Leaud, but his auteurial works were "weird" and unexpected in a far different way than Dean's.
See, I can actually imagine Logan Lerman doing oddball stuff later in his career. Granted, I don't know much about him, but from reading interviews with him, he seems like he has a genuine respect for the cinema and could surprise us one day. But I could be totally wrong (as I have been in the past) and your point is a valid one. There are very few child actors I can see doing Lynchian films at any point in the future. Then again, would anyone have predicted in the 1940s that cute lil' Dean Stockwell would be in a film as (amazingly) perverse as Blue Velvet?
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