Friday, September 9, 2011

100 Hot Men and a Dame: #95 Colin Farrell

95. Colin Farrell
Occupation: Actor
Nationality: Irish
Age: 35
Best Known For: A wildly erratic filmography, which includes Tigerland, Phone Booth, S.W.A.T., Daredevil, Alexander, The New World, In Bruges and Horrible Bosses.

Joining me in this latest installment is my good friend (and the other half of the Whores of Twitter) JD from the blog Valley Dreamin'. This is his first of many entries in the countdown, so I hope you enjoy JD's one of a kind sense of humor!

Dame James: When did you first encounter Colin and, if it wasn't love at first sight, when did you fall in love with him?

JD: I first saw him in Phone Booth I'd reckon but my junk didn't really respond because I wasn't *there* yet. But by the time Alexander and The New World and his penchant for fucking hot photoshoots happened, I was ready. Also, ya know, the sex tape. It came riiight at the point where I was starting to be a horndog but not quite there yet; I think it really sent me over permanently to that direction. If that's not love, I don't know what is!

Dame James: Actually, I think Phone Booth may have been the first thing I saw Colin in as well, give or take Minority Report which I probably didn't even register him being in at the time (or now, come to think of it). The film that hooked me was Tigerland, which is basically an ode to how incredibly sexy and gorgeous he is. The fact that it's confined in the inherent homoeroticness of Army life only makes Colin sexier. Plus, I get an even bigger hard-on when pretty boys can act and, up until In Bruges, this was my favorite performance of his.

Going through his IMDb page, I realize there's a lot of stuff I haven't seen and, for the most part, I don't feel like I'm missing much. I was excited about the homosexuality of Alexander but then I read that Oliver Stone basically cut all of that out (For shame!). A Home At the End of the World is Sensitive Colin, which I'm not sure exists, or want to exist, and that source material is such complete and utter shit. His sex tape is probably the most intriguing thing I haven't seen.

JD: Alexander is just a fucking weird movie. The homosexuality isn't taken out entirely but what's left is so muddled and confusingly done. But Colin shows his dick at least! And it has Angie Jolie being a crazy campy bitch which is also a plus.

You haven't seen the sex tape?! It's only like 15 minutes long, MAKE ROOM FOR IT. (I'd definitely make room for it. #JDnontweets)

Dame James: No, I haven't seen it, but I'm notoriously bad at seeing infamous sex tapes. Also, women. Ew. I don't need non-Anne Hathaway boobs interrupting my pornography, thank you very much. Is the tape from before he was famous?

JD: I think the sex tape was around the time he was filming Daredevil so his head was shaved, and it was with a Playboy model. You've at least seen the screencaps, though, right?

Dame James: I haven't even seen screencaps. I didn't even know it existed until two days ago. Man oh man, I miss everything!

The only problem I have with Colin is that his look changes so much and my opinion changes drastically with each look. Love the short hair/scruff combo of the Tigerland years and the In Bruges/Cassandra's Dream years but find the long shaggy hair/full-on beard years a waste. Do you find yourself going back and forth like me? If no, do you prefer a certain look over another?

JD: Ehhh, I know his changing looks are understandably a problem for some people, but I don't think I've ever minded any of them. I do agree his best is the simple short black hair/scruff look.

Dame James: At least we agree on that. I suppose when you have as long a history with someone as you do with Colin, you'll find him attractive no matter what in the hell he looks like. Isn't that the definition of true love?

Anyways, speaking of true love, remember the days when he and Britney were fucking? I think it was just after she broke up with Justin and her hormones were racing and she was fucking everyone in sight and Colin, like the decent, sexed-up god that he is, took advantage of that? Okay, so it's not quite the storybook romance that Britney and Justin were but don't you love Colin just a little bit more for bangin' the Princess of Pop?

JD: I totally forgot they did but YOU'RE RIGHT. Oh man. haha.

Dame James: Anyways, one last topic: the bad boy factor. Just how much does it work to his advantage? Would we still be as hot for him from a purely physical standpoint if there wasn't the risk that he'd shove us against a wall and have hot, angry sex with us and then not call the next day?

JD: Imagining Colin Farrell as a 'nice', 'sensible', 'considerate' person just...doesn't register, you know? It's a huge part of why he's so fucking attractive! Especially for angry wall sex, absolutely. Mmmmm.

So, what do you think? Do you like the idea of a Sensitive Colin Farrell or do you, like Lady Gaga in her glory days, like it rough?

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