Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Somebody Please Tell 'Em Who the Eff She Is

I don't think I've ever spoken of my love for Nicki Minaj before, which is very nearly a crime worthy of capital punishment given how "Super Bass" is my favorite song of the year, so I want to take some time to talk about her. As a white boy from rural Michigan, rap isn't exactly my forte. Not surprisingly, though, of the rappers I do enjoy, the vast majority of them are females. Missy Elliott has always been my favorite--although with legendary tracks like "Work It" and "Get Ur Freak On", who could compete?--but Nicki is quickly catching up. Not only is the woman versatile beyond belief, Nicki also has some of the most clever, interesting lyrics this side of Kanye West at his best. She's an artist who only gets more interesting with time and I can't wait to hear what insanity she comes out with next. To celebrate her, I decided to give a brief rundown of my favorite Nicki verses, whether from her solo work or as a guest artist.

10. "In My Head [Remix]"
It's not very often where I find myself audibly laughing while listening to lyrics, but on this remix of the Jason Derülo hit, I still chuckle at certain bits of Nicki's verse.
Key Lyric: "Smash more clubs than Tiger Woods' wifey"

09. "Up Out My Face [Remix]"
This is the first time I ever heard Nicki after at least a couple of months of hype surrounding her. I must admit that at first, I didn't get the big deal. But after numerous listens to this remix of Mariah Carey's jam, I finally got it.
Key Lyric: "Cat's away, well the mice will play/LOL, smiley face, have a nice-a day"


08. "Your Love"
The first Nicki song I ever truly loved, which is surprising because it's neither the type of rap she's known for or the kind of rapping I love best from her. But, backed by an Annie Lennox sample (!!!!), Nicki wrote a surprisingly tender rap about finding a soulmate.
Key Lyric: "When I was a geisha, he was a samurai/Somehow I understood him when he spoke Thai"

07. "Did It On 'Em"
This gem of an album track would probably pass you by unnoticed if you didn't take a second and listen to the lyrics. There are so many hilarious and off-beat boasts (maybe acting as a parody?) that puts many other rappers and their lame attempts and building themselves up to shame.
Key Lyric: "If I had a dick, I would pull it out and piss on 'em"

06. "Super Bass"
My favorite Nicki song. The only reason it's not ranked higher is because I love this song for reasons other than its lyrics. She may be more clever on other songs, but that doesn't diminish the amazingness of this song.
Key Lyric: "I mean, you're so shy and I'm loving your tie/You're like slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye, oh"

05. "Where Them Girls At"
Even though it was a hit in the UK earlier this year, I only just got into this song a couple of weeks ago. Nicki often does her finest work featuring on other people's songs where she often steals the show and this David Guetta track is no exception. The moment I truly fell for this song, I was on my way to work and I was cracking up at Nicki's verse.
Key Lyric: "You can suck a dick, you can suck on a ballsack/No, no, I don't endorse that, p-p-p-pause that, abort that"

04. "Girls Fall Like Dominoes"
Nicki's flow on this song is incredible. And I love the way the first and second verses really have nothing to do with each other but they somehow sound quite harmonious next to each other. Bonus points for name dropping both Mo'Nique and Grace Jones in a song!
Key Lyric: "Material girls like Madonna/Model for Donatella/Ain't nothing you can tell her 'cause she get that mozzarella"

03. "Bottoms Up"
This is the song I use to get pumped whenever I got out drinking with my friends. Even before we touch a drop of alcohol, my friend Megan and I try to sing Nicki's verse on this song and, dear God, we cannot keep up for the life of us. Such a perfect little ode to getting completely hammered.
Key Lyric: "Rest in piece to Anna Nicole Smith/Yes, my dear, you're so explosive/Say hi to Mary, Mary and Joseph/Now bottoms up and double my doses"

02. "Roman's Revenge"
I wasn't crazy about this song at first. Now I can't imagine a world without it. Whatever your opinion of Eminem's verses (I think they work and are the most inspired things he's done in ages), we all have to agree that Nicki absolutely kills it on this song. I am in absolute awe of her ability to play with random words and phrases and put them together in phrases that make complete sense.
Key Lyric: "Word, that bitch mad 'cause I took the spot?/Well, bitch, if you ain't shittin', then get off the pot"


01. "Monster"
A song by Kanye West which also features Jay-Z and little ole Nicki Minaj is the one who steals the entire show? This was Nicki's "Bad Romance" moment: the instant we all realized that she wasn't fucking around and was, in fact, the real deal. Her entire verse is not only cleverly written but is also delivered with such a relentless energy unlike anyone in the game today.
Key Lyric: "But really, really, I don't give a F-U-C-K/Forget Barbie, fuck Nicki she escaped/She on a diet but her cock is eating cheesecake"

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