Tuesday, August 12, 2008
People Who Can Suck It: Katy Perry
Who Needs to Suck It: Katy Perry, inexplicably hot singer as of right now thanks to the success of "I Kissed a Girl"
Why She Needs to Suck It: I don't have as much of a problem with Perry, per se, as I do with her song. "I Kissed a Girl" is inoffensive on its own, but its sudden and huge popularity pisses me off. I'm not going to call the song homophobic or anything like that because it's really not. Instead, I'm going to focus on my disgust that we have yet another medium playing into the straight male fantasy of two straight women getting so drunk that they let go of their inhibitions and make out with each other. Straight guys: this does not ever happen outside of The Real World or Girls Gone Wild so stop pretending that this song will change things. It makes me want to vomit thinking about the vapid, empty-headed party girls who think this song is clever and now will be using it as an excuse to make out with a random girl for fun one night at a kegger. There's also a hidden double standard that comes with the popularity of this song: if Justin Timberlake released a song called "I Kissed a Boy" and only changed the word "girl" to "boy," there's no way in hell it would ever be popular. The same people who loved "I Kissed a Girl" would be grossed out and some Baptist church would probably burn copies of the CD. So, Katy Perry, your second single better be one hell of a song if you're gonna convert me to your side after the poorly written piece of shit that is "I Kissed a Girl."