Thursday, October 8, 2009

The Black Eyed Peas' Reign of Terror is Over!

For half a year, the United States has been living under a shadow of darkness. The Black Eyed Peas, a group formerly known for providing the world with such uncompromisingly and unapologetic masterpieces of pop trash like 'Don't Phunk With My Heart,' 'Hey Mama' and, most notoriously, 'My Humps,' unleashed upon the world 'Boom Boom Pow.' Originally, I thought this tuneless, surprisingly uncatchy and strutcture-lacking mess of random beats and Fergie wailing was never going to be a hit. So imagine my surprise when it hit number one. And then again. And again. And again. And again... 12 weeks in total. I thought America had lost its damn mind. Little did I know they were just getting started.

Then came the next single, 'I Gotta Feeling' and it quickly overturned 'Boom Boom Pow' as the new #1 hit in America. 'I Gotta Feeling' is a better song than 'Boom Boom Pow'--it actually has a chorus and a structure--but that's really not saying much. It's the John McCain to 'Boom Boom Pow's George Bush: a better choice given the two but I'd rather shoot myself in the foot than pick either willingly. One of the things that surprised me about 'Boom Boom Pow's long reign at the top was that no one I talked to even liked the song, let alone thought it was good enough to be that popular for so long. So you can imagine my surprise when 'I Gotta Feeling' was #1 for 14 (FOURTEEN) weeks in a row; by week ten, who the fuck cared enough about this song to buy it off iTunes? When the song prevented both Miley's 'Party in the USA' and a collaboration between Jay-Z, Rihanna AND Kanye West, it seemed like an unstoppable force of nature that we'd never get rid of.

But then an angel named Jay Sean came and changed everything. Kameron at Kameron Aloud first told me about him and his song 'Down' around a month ago. He absolutely loves it and while I didn't find it revolutionary, I think it's quite good for this type of Usher-ripoff song. Of course, there's an incredibly unnecessary rap from Lil' Wayne in the middle, but that's easily forgettable. 'Down' has been hovering in the Top 10 for a few weeks now but, finally this week, the song became this country's first non-Black Eyed Peas #1 in half a year. The darkness hovering over us has finally dissipated and all I see on the horizon are blue skies, white fluffy clouds and rainbows. Jay Sean, you are a gift from heaven.


And not that bad looking, I must add. Have you all seen the beginning of the 'Down' music video? Damn.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

"It's the John McCain to 'Boom Boom Pow's George Bush: a better choice given the two but I'd rather shoot myself in the foot than pick either willingly."

classic. I so freaking agree. As for the term 'Usher-ripoff', bitch please (in my head I said it like the character from SNL, yeah you know! That one! Well have you watched this past season she was on it? Well anyway...) Jay Sean's "Down" is amazingly spectacular and the video is magical, I love the simple dance routine. Did you know Nadine Coyle is featured on a track on his upcoming debut American album? Exciting!

Dame James said...

When I said "Usher-ripoff," I didn't mean it as an insult. I haven't liked an Usher song since 2001 so it's not like I think his music is amazing or anything. What I really meant was that 'Down' sounds like a song Usher would make, but Jay Sean makes it much better (And I totally what you're talking about with the "Bitch Please" film reviewer on SNL). I can't wait for the Nadine duet; it sounds kickass!

S said...

Just listened to Boom Boom Pow for the first time. That's a terrible song. Terrible. Terrible. How did that get recorded/released nevermind get to number one?

At least "I Gotta Feeling" sounds pleasant. This other one is grating.