On Mother's Day 2007, I wrote this post "honoring" the ten worst mothers in film, TV and even a book. This was a couple months after I started Rants of a Diva and I'm not ashamed to admit that it's not one of the shining moments of my blogging career. I remember at the time having a difficult time trying to come up with ten and that shows in some of the weak choices (why the hell didn't I think of the ultimate bad mommy, Julianne Moore, in any of her numerous roles in this vein?). On top of that, the writing is just horrid, horrid, horrid. If anything, I'd like to forget that this post exists.
But some people out there won't let me. For some reason, this post is constantly the most viewed page on my blog and every three months or so, some anonymous twit makes a stupid comment about the fact that I picked the fabulous Joan Crawford over Catherine Roerva, the psychotic real-life mommy in Dave Pelzer's A Child Called It. Now, listen, by now I hope that anyone who reads this blog regularly knows my general likes and preferences. So, given these two options, which of them am I more likely to pick? Dave Pelzer's books were popular in my junior high and I, of course, read them so I remember all the horrific things she put that poor guy through. I realize that there is just no comparison between locking a child in a non-ventilated bathroom with obnoxious amounts of ammonia and forcing your child to eat a raw steak. If I was Oprah, I'd be shouting, "I get it, peopleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" But, anonymous commenters, if you had taken ten seconds to look around my site and notice it's name (Diva is in the f-ing title), my sexuality (I post about Zac Efron nearly every week) and my obvious love of Faye Dunaway (see this post), you would see that there is absolutely no way Roerva could beat the unstoppable force of nature that is Dunaway's Joan Crawford. It's not a definitive list of worst mothers ever in order of offenses; it's just a silly list ranked in an somewhat arbitrary order by my silly preferences. So, in summary, please stop e-mailing and commenting about this dumbass post. It's stupid and barely worth defending at this point when I've done other posts I'm so much more proud of.