Friday, June 4, 2010

An Open Letter to Lady GaGa Fans

Dear Lady GaGa Fans:

You're ruining Lady GaGa for me.

Ever since I heard 'Just Dance' on the radio in late 2008, I have loved the woman known as GaGa. I defended her against many of her now rabid devotees who thought she was nothing but a Madonna wannabe (HA, remember those days?). Around the time of the 'Paparazzi' video, however, a lot of people saw that she was her own artist. The comparisons stopped and many of her one-time haters became hardcore fans overnight. With the 1-2-3-4 punch of her insane VMA performance, her 'Bad Romance' video, the release of The Fame Monster and her tour, GaGa's fanbase went mental in a short period of time. And this is precisely where the problem started.

The gays like to make fun of Justin Bieber and his devoted legion of tween fans, but, in all honesty, there's not much difference between a Bieberhead and a fanatical GaGa gay. The only thing that separates them is the fact that the gay can usually compose a proper sentence when announcing their devotion 14 times a day. And boy are the gays devoted. Every televised performance is not simply a great performance but, rather, "THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN WITH MY EYES. THE RESURRECTION OF JESUS WAS LESS SPECTACULAR THAN WHAT I AM WITNESSING. I HEART GAGA!" What about that Glee Goes GaGa episode which everyone thought was so amazing? That was an embarrassment both to the Glee cast and GaGa's music. Dressing up in GaGa's costumes, doing some rudimentary moves from her videos and singing a lame karaoke version of 'Bad Romance' does not count as a great musical number. Ask any gay man who watched that episode, however, and it comes across as if that sequence redefined the musical as we know it. I think I'm beginning to understand the problem Ann Coulter has conversing with liberals.

I could ignore many of these minor irritants by simply closing my Twitter feed, but the grander problem these sentiments address is both unavoidable and distressing. This all-around obsession with GaGa has gone from simple adoration to destructive. The gays are a notoriously fickle group. When they love you, they REALLY love you. But when they don't, you better watch out because the venom is going to come out. Xtina recently experienced this with her "GaGa imitation" 'Not Myself Tonight'. The gays turned on her so quickly and so unexpectedly, my head is still spinning. I'm literally scared for how Madonna and Britney are going to fare in this post-GaGa pop landscape. I'm already pretty sure they're going to be lambasted for "stealing" from GaGa even while they're doing the same thing they've been doing since GaGa was still Stefani. Let's be clear about one thing: GaGa did not invent the idea of a stage persona or using sexuality as a part of this persona, nor did she invent pop music. Lord knows I love her, but the idea that she invented anything new, besides her individual persona, is completely ridiculous.

So, GaGa fans, I am urging you to tone it down a bit. I understand that you love her--I certainly do, too--but you're turning a great woman into an unpleasant experience with every mention of her. Also, GaGa, please go away for awhile. After the 'Alejandro' video (and I'm already preparing for an onslaught of "GREATEST. VIDEO. EVER." tweets when that premieres), I don't want to see your face for six months. Give me a chance to miss you! Let the gays talk about something else for awhile instead of how you invented the long-form music video.


Dame James


J.D. said...

I have been wanting to make a post like this for months now, but I guess I'm just not blunt enough.


Jose said...

And even her persona is nothing but a mishmash of things Madonna, Annie Lennox and Bjork were doing before GaGa was even a fetus.
One of my friends got very pissed at me because I didn't belong to the church of GaGa.
In the middle of a coup in my country and political chaos he was more distressed at the fact that I didn't agree with his new saint, than at the bombings out in the street.

Fuck 'em all I say!

Darn Dirty Dame said...

I generally agree with you. I think it's strange how Paparazzi seems to be the song that turned everything around. It's ok and all, but I never thought it would turn into such a huge hit.

Re: Persona

It always gets on my nerves when people act like it's something extremely deep. I always thought she was just joshing us, having fun and watching people's reactions etc. I've always taken her diatribes about art and everything else with a grain of salt, so it perplexes me when people break up into fights over her latest soundbite.

I can't even go on ohnotheydidnt anymore without wanting to bang my head up against a wall.

J.D. said...

"Paparazzi" is her only single so far to not break the top 5 in the U.S. (well except "Alejandro" but that's at #6 right now and it hasn't peaked yet) SO.

I really do think it was more "Bad Romance"/The Fame Monster that did it.

Glenn said...

I like her, but it's almost becoming a chore these days. Having to qualify everything about her in giant long tedious essays. An essay about one aspect of her music video, an essay about her hairstyle and so on and so on. I enjoy her music and I enjoy her image (although my criticism of her still stands, she's an awesome Grace Jones personality with the songs of a top 40 recording artist. nothing wrong with that, but it's silly to call her music such things as "haute culture" or "weird" - it's not, it's standard pop music albeit elevated over the likes of personalty-free drones that have hogged the limelight of recent years).

I think the obsession with GaGa is very indicative of a lot of things lately actually. Obsession with the NOW with little to no knowledge about anything else. No, GaGa wasn't the first to do what she's doing as you say.

BTW, as an average GaGa fan and a Glee fan I thought the two GaGa numbers on that show were two of the weakest in the second half season.