Sunday, November 16, 2008

It's Still a Felony!

I don't think it's wrong for me to say that I find Nick Jonas sexy, right? I'm a complete sucker for his squinty eyes, that curly mess of hair on his head and his shy, sweet demeanor. He's 16 now and legal in most states (including Michigan!) and I'm only 20. Some people may find it completely inapprorpiate, but who cares, they can suck it. No matter how much I try to rationalize it, however, this voice (at the 0:28 mark) keeps running through my head...

Ah, Joel McHale, why do you have to make me feel so bad? I don't think I'm as bad as Justin Gaston, since Nick and I aren't practically dry humping each other in the church pews or blowing kisses to each other on the runway. Or, you know, we haven't met.

The only thing that has me slightly confused is the fact that Nick seems like the nicest guy on the planet and yet he not one, but two songs written by ex-girlfriends about how much they hate him. So, he's either that amazing to be with that they were driven Fatal Attraction crazy (without the attempted murder or rabbit stew) or he's just a douche. I'm leaning more towards amazing (I'm mean, we're talking about Miley Cyrus here) but, either way, I'd still bone him.

Just for fun, here are a couple of extra pictures of the lovely Nick.

Doesn't this one look like Cate Blanchett doing Nick Jonas doing Cate Blanchett doing Bob Dylan? Very meta, I must say.

And while we're on the subject of the Brothers Jonas, can someone please explain to me what the hell is happening in this music video for "Lovebug"? It goes from talking about some couple during the war á la "God Must Have Spent A Little More Time on You" and then, all of a sudden, Nick and Joe are on a boat in glasses and it ends up with everyone at some dance "rocking" out to the Brothers Jonas. Say what? Is it too much to ask for a little coherence? This video is so bad it actually makes the corny and trite "Burnin' Up" video look 100 times better. It also doesn't help that "Lovebug" is probably the worst, most boring song on A Little Bit Longer. If they wanted to go on the ballad route, why not the title track which is actually a half-way decent song (even if Nick's voice is a tad whiny) or, going in a completely different direction, "One Man Show," which I'm 95% sure is about masturbation ("I'm a one man show/I don't need no one/I'll be fine alone").

1 comment:

J.D. said...

Dude, quit sweating it. So you're lusting after an adorable, sexy teenager whom you could legally have sex with in the state you currently reside in.... like, OMG, that's so unforgivably horrible.

*rolls eyes*