Top 50 Songs of 2011, Part 1

The time has come! The end of the year is approaching so that means the end of the year lists must start. And what better way to kick all that off than with the first installment of my favorite songs of the year? As always, I had a difficult time narrowing my list down and placing them in the proper order, but after moving songs back and forth around the list, I threw in the towel and stopped fiddling with the order. I decided to split this list in two this year because I wanted to write at least a little something about each of the songs and I didn't want the post to become dauntingly enormous. So please do enjoy this list and let me know what you think about my inclusions. And stayed tuned for the Top 20 coming soon!

Honorable Mentions: Demi Lovato "Skyscraper" | Natalia Kills "Free" | One Direction "Gotta Be You" | CocknBullKid "Hold On to Your Misery" | Will Young "Jealousy" | Britney Spears "Hold It Against Me" | Alexandra Stan "Get Back (ASAP)" | Eric Saade featuring J-Son "Hearts in the Air" | Selena Gomez & The Scene "Love You Like a Love Song" | Alexis Jordan "Hush Hush"

50-41

50. Simon Curtis "Superhero"

The moment I first saw Simon Curtis as a legitimate pop star.

49. Leona Lewis & Avicii "Collide"

Not quite the "Outta My Head" dance jam I was expecting, but it's nice to see Leona push herself out of her power ballad comfort zone.

48. Pitbull featuring Ne-Yo, Afrojack & Nayer "Give Me Everything"

Commercial as hell? Yes. But that chorus saves the day. You actually forget Pitbull is on this song!

47. Alesha Dixon featuring Jay Sean "Every Little Part of Me"

Alesha's career is deader than Floptina's at the moment, which is a shame when she's still releasing songs as fresh as this one.

46. Beyoncé "Run the World (Girls)"

My feelings on this song went from "What a piece of shit!" to "Ooooh, the video's interesting. Maybe this song isn't so bad after all" to "Who run the world? Beyoncé."

45. Bingo Players "Cry (Just a Little)"

This song is as barebones as dancehall songs get: a pounding beat and a couple of lyrics from the 80's song "Piano in the Dark" repeated over and over. But its simplicity is what makes it one of the most irresistibly catchy songs of the year.

44. CocknBullKid "Asthma Attack"

The new critical darling of the indie pop world, CocknBullKid burst on the scene the first half of the year. "Hold On to Your Misery" caught my attention first, but "Asthma Attack" is the song that I keep going back to.

43. The Sound of Arrows "Nova"

This sort of synth pop isn't always my thing. But when I think it works, it really works for me. "Nova" is absolutely gorgeous, as close to a hymn as pop music gets.

42. Alexis Jordan "Good Girl"

The moment Alexis Jordan truly arrived. Who knew she would be one of the freshest popstars of the year?

41. David Guetta featuring Flo Rida & Nicki Minaj "Where Them Girls At"

Even with Guetta and Flo Rida at their generic worst, Nicki Minaj classes up the joint with one of her most wicked verses ever. She's so good spitting out lyrics like, "No, no, I don't endorse that/Pause that, abort that!" she elevates the material surrounding her.

40-31

40. Wynter Gordon "Buy My Love"

Last year's "Believer" proved that Wynter had promise. And she makes good on that promise with this ode to becoming a kept woman.

39. Rebecca Black "Friday"

Somewhere in the past nine months this song went from a hilarious joke to heralding the arrival of the next big teen pop star. Whether you think it's a classic or a sign of the apocalypse, Rebecca carries this song with her infectious personality and the ability to sing the silliest lyrics alive ("Tomorrow is Saturday/And Sunday comes afterward") with a straight face.

38. Taio Cruz featuring Kylie Minogue "Higher"

This track is all about Kylie. She elevates this flaccid Taio solo into a sexy, sultry duet.

37. Frankmusik "The Fear Inside"

Vincent first attempt at a more commercial sound. It didn't exactly set the charts ablaze but it did solidify him in my mind as one of the few legitimately great male pop stars we have today.

36. Frankmusik & Colette Carr "No I.D."

In this age of guest rappers and female popstars belting choruses on rap songs, "No I.D." is one of the few legitimate duets around. Vincent & Colette's chemistry is blazing, turning this simple pop track into a repeat worthy jam.

35. Robyn "Call Your Girlfriend"

She still makes the best Dancing Through the Tears pop songs. And the video is to die for!

34. Joe McElderry "Someone Wake Me Up"

La Joe finally found success as Classic Joe this year. An unfortunate situation, it would appear, as this means that Popstar Joe is more or less on permanent hiatus. How sad. Who in the fuck actually prefers him doing opera shit over stuff like "Someone Wake Me Up"?

33. Agnes "Don't Go Breaking My Heart"

Agnes, of the Carlsson variety, thankfully returned to the music world with this in-your-face jam. That opening riff is legendary in its own right.

32. Rhianna featuring Calvin Harris "We Found Love"

I originally fell in love with this song because it showed off Rihanna in a subtly different light, pushing herself away from the hard edge of the Rated R era and the Back to Commercial-ness of the Loud era to something far more DJ/rave friendly. But I stayed interested in this song was because hidden under the insane Harris production, there's a tender, almost mournful love story about falling out of love.

31. Florence + The Machine "Shake It Out"

Florence is an artist I tend to admire more than I actually like, but there's something honest and ever-so-gripping about this power ballad.

30-21

30. Alexandra Stan "Mr. Saxobeat"

It's exactly the type of Eurotrash pop song most people who know nothing about European pop music assume all European pop music is...yet I can't help but be infatuated with "Saxobeat" for the very same reasons it's hated.

29. Katy Perry "E.T."

Outside of the album track "Circle the Drain," this is by far Katy Perry's most adult track. And the fact that she picked it as a single at all over the pandering "Peacock" is further proof of her maturity as both an artist and an icon.

28. Dev "In the Dark"

Dev's limited vocal range works far better in this sexy track than in "Bass Down Low" or in any of her umpteen featuring credits during the year.

27. Foster the People "Pumped Up Kicks"

Have we come across a unicorn with Foster the People: an act both the indie kids and the pop lovers can agree on? I couldn't begin to tell you what this song is about, and it's low key nature would normally annoy the hell out of me, but, like most of what Foster the People does, it just works. Sometimes you just can't explain it.

26. Take That "Love Love"

Who knew that in 2011 not only would I care about Take That post-"Back For Good" but I would also actually really love one of their new songs? The world is tricky like that sometimes.

25. Jessie J "Do It Like a Dude"

Forget about the annoying, wailing twat she has become. For a brief second, Jessie J looked the toughest pop star to come along in ages with this hard-as-nails anthem.

24. Ola "All Over the World"

This Swedish import was released in Ola's homeland back in 2010 but made it's way to the UK this year. It's three and a half minutes of pure, unadulterated joy, aka everything a pop song of this nature should be.

23. Britney Spears "Till The World Ends"

If the upcoming apocalypse in December 2012 is anywhere near as amazing as this song, the world will be ending on a high note.

22. Christina Perri "Jar of Hearts"

One of those tragic, old fashioned ballads that come along every few years and knocks the socks off everyone. Perri's version will no doubt become the standard, but "Jar of Hearts" is so brilliantly written nearly anyone can sing it and sound like they are a legend.

21. The Wanted "Glad You Came"

Every bit as poised as "California Gurls" to be an Easy Summertime Anthem but with a wicked, deviant sense of humor and clever wordplay (thanks in part to co-writer Ed Drewett).

Top 10 Albums of 2010

What a strange year for music. Never before have I had to reconcile my list so much between commercial albums and artistic endeavors of the highest (pop) order. I feel like I've got a good feel for what I think of as the most important albums of the year, but I doubt anyone else will agree. Oh well. I've been called the Armond White of the blogosphere before so I may as well live up to that reputation. Enjoy!

Runner-Ups: Selena Gomez & The Scene came this close to making it and in a weaker year, I could see their sophomore album A Year Without Rain making a serious run for the top spot. That girl certainly has grown up musically in eight short months; Janelle Monáe's The ArchAndroid has proven to be a love-it-or-hate-it album. I adore the more commercial sounding first half, led by singles 'Cold War' and 'Tightrope' but that more experimental second half, 'Come Alive' aside, often leaves me cold; I wasn't sure whether or not to include Wynter Gordon's The First Dance EP since it's technically not a complete album. Those six songs, however, make for one of the most consistently absorbing listens of the year. Can't wait to see what this girl does next; And, yes, I have to give props to Justin Bieber for My World 2.0. He hasn't quite reached the level of Miley, Demi & Selena yet, but he's getting there. I expect his next album to be a real contender.

10. David Archuleta, The Other Side of Down

As I admitted a few months ago, Archie's sophomore album isn't exactly groundbreaking musically speaking. What it lacks in innovation, however, it more than makes up for in pure listenability. Archie's voice is quickly developing a distinct personality that was lacking on his solid, if unremarkable, debut album. The Other Side of Down is a major stepping stone in Archie's career and I couldn't be prouder of the little fellow.

Key Tracks: 'Stomping the Roses', 'Something 'Bout Love', 'Look Around'


09. Gabriella Cilmi, Ten
Cilmi's debut album was high on vocal ability but low on follow through. But it appears that Cilmi learned her lessons (ha!) for Ten, her sophomore album. Lead by the massive, highly charged first single 'On a Mission' and its more mellow but just as kinetic second single 'Hearts Don't Lie,' Ten proves that Cilmi can retain her natural soul in a more aggressive electropop setting.
Key Tracks: 'On a Mission', 'Hearts Don't Lie', 'Superman'


08. Hurts, Happiness
The gloomy British duo's debut album captured the hearts of serious-minded pop music lovers with tastes far loftier than my own. Surprisingly, I found myself completely falling for Hurts' beautiful melancholy. They make miserablist music without forgetting that the music should ultimately be listenable as well.
Key Tracks: 'Wonderful Life', 'Blood, Tears & Gold', 'Devotion'


07. Rihanna, Loud
It's no Rated R, but neither is it pretending to be anything like that masterpiece. And it's not a retread to her former Good Girl Gone Bad glory, á la Kelly Clarkson's All I Ever Wanted; if anything, the album is stronger and more consistent than that slightly overpraised collection of singles. Rihanna has moved on from the past. There's no looking back anymore and Loud is there documenting her journey forward.
Key Tracks: 'Man Down', 'Fading', 'Only Girl (In the World)'


06. Ke$ha, Animal
Ke$ha's end of the year 8-track album Cannibal was a complete turd and signaled that perhaps the Queen of Trash Pop needs to change it up a bit next time around. But there's no denying that her first album, a glittertrash mash-up of hot mess dance tracks, showed that the pop world needed a slutty, alcohol-fueled alternative to Lady GaGa.
Key Tracks: 'Party at a Rich Dude's House', 'TiK ToK', 'Your Love Is My Drug'


05. Alphabeat, The Spell/The Beat Is...
The Danish pop band known for their retro 80's music channeled Ace of Base and the best of 90's pop music on their latest album to near perfect results.
Key Tracks: 'The Spell', 'Heat Wave', 'Heart Failure'


04. Kelis, Flesh Tone
And the award for "Best Album I Rarely Listen to But Every Time I Do I Quickly Fall In Love With It Again and Wonder Why I'm Not Listening to It 24/7" goes to Kelis' latest album. The 'Milkshake' diva ditches the hip-hop and embraces her electropop side with shockingly fantastic results. Who knew that the chick who once screamed "I hate you so much right now!" is now one of our greatest Dancehall Queens.
Key Tracks: 'Emancipate', 'Song for the Baby', 'Acapella'


03. Joe McElderry, Wide Awake
Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected the dullest contestant on The X-Factor to produce not only an album this alive and electrically charged but, also, perhaps, the greatest debut album from a reality show finalist ever. La Joe and Simon clearly reached a compromise--give me a few ballads and I'll let you do whatever crazy electropop stuff you want--but it never once feels like he is compromising himself as an artist. The album's bombing is unfortunate, but, if anything, it may eventually lead him to a label who will know what to do with his interests and talents (here's hoping Cherrytree, home of Robyn and Frankmusik, snatches him up after Simon releases him).
Key Tracks: 'Someone Wake Me Up', 'Ambitions', 'Until the Stars Run Out'


02. Robyn, Body Talk Trilogy
Part 1 was the more consistent album. Part 2 was a bit hit or miss but contains 'U Should Know Better', possibly my new favorite Robyn song ever. Part 3 was great but didn't quite reach the levels of Part 1. How on Earth was I to choose just one of these albums? In the end, I decided that I needed to just honor the complete trilogy for its sheer ballsiness and complete listenability.
Key Tracks: 'U Should Know Better', 'Dancing On My Own', 'Cry When You Get Older'


01. Miley Cyrus, Can't Be Tamed
I resisted as long as I could, ladies and gentlemen. I know a lot of you were confused by my initial lust for this album, and I seriously thought that my complete and unrelenting infatuation with it would pass with time. But it didn't. And as I sat down thinking about this list, trying to come up with a number one, I kept coming back to this album. Sure, the album isn't perfect--'Forgiveness and Love' is utterly unlistenable--but all of its highlights make up for the imperfections. Miley can go on and on about how she isn't a pop artist, but Can't Be Tamed proves that this is where the girl needs to concentrate her talents. Her limited range shines here in ways that other genres or styles of music wouldn't support her. And the tracks not only sound bloody good but they also tap into Miley's personal life far more than we've ever seen. She can say over and over again that 'Liberty Walk' and 'Robot' are about women leaving abusive relationships, but they reveal so much about her relationship with Disney as a corporate product and coming into her own as an artist without them controlling her. There's no denying that Can't Be Tamed is hardly the most serious album of the year but it's the one I feel offers the most insightful look at its artist and the one I keep thinking of as The Moment in music this year. If that's not enough for a number one spot on this list, I don't know what else is.
Key Tracks: 'Who Owns My Heart', 'Can't Be Tamed', 'Robot'

Imaginary Boyfriends of 2010

Darren Criss

He managed to make Glee watchable for roughly five minutes with his renditions of 'Teenage Dream' and the originally dire 'Hey Soul Sister.' For that alone, he makes what the original Miracle Worker Anne Sullivan did look like child's play. And he was surprisingly sexy and sultry on 'Baby It's Cold Outside,' his duet with Chris Colfer; Lord knows I wouldn't have refused if he asked me to stay the night.

Ed Drewett

He's a hot Aryan ready and willing to save electropop from the clutches of evil doers who want to see it destroyed. You really can't ask for much more than that, can you?

Michael Fassbender

Literally one week into 2010, I witnessed what is perhaps the most indelible image of the year in Fish Tank: Michael Fassbender, shirtless and with pants barely covering his ass, first appears in the life of the film's protagonist. The rest of the film is pure Fassbender Porn as director Andrea Arnold subsequently makes both Katie Jarvis and the audience slowly fall in pure lust with the man. I thought he was particularly charming in last year's Inglourious Basterds, but 2010 was the year when I wanted Michael Fassbender to put me over his knee and spank me as he does to Katie Jarvis at one point in Fish Tank.

Tom Ford and his muse Nicholas Hoult

While Fish Tank was Fassbender Porn, Tom Ford's directorial debut A Single Man was Nicholas Hoult Porn. I didn't get to see it until early in this year but it was so worth the wait. Ford is clearly in love with Nicholas Hoult's face and spends a good amount of time filling the frame with his wonderful mug. And don't even get me started about That Scene! Nick and Tom clearly know what we all want and aren't afraid to give it to us. While Nick was showing the goods on-screen, Tom brings them every time he makes a public appearance. The man is approaching 50 and is as fuckable as ever. Together, this fabulous duo made 2010 that much sexier.

Andrew Garfield

"Oh Andy!" became a popular expression around my Twitter account in the weeks leading into the release of The Social Network and I haven't stopped using it since. There's simply so much to love about this adorable Brit--his talent, his good looks, his awkwardness, his goofiness--and 2010 offered a smorgasbord of Andy delights. The year started with Red Riding: 1974, a British crime drama which featured Andy as a hulking sex god who...I don't know, solves a crime or something? I honestly remember very little of the actual film besides him sexing Rebecca Hall and his glorious Louis Garrel-esque Sex Hair. Next came Never Let Me Go, which was good but felt like a little bit of a retread of his Boy A work. Finally, we have The Social Network, which is hopefully going to snag him an Oscar nomination come January. He does excellent work in the film, bouncing off Eisenberg's introverted asshole savant with his usual subtlety and nuance. Coming up next: the new Spider Man film which, for once, I'm actually excited about like your average fanboy. But I'm sure it's for far different reasons.

Tom Hardy

After Marion Cotillard, the one thing in Inception that left the most vivid impression on me was the hulking, but equally charismatic, Tom Hardy. He clearly wasn't taking the whole premise seriously and managed to inject some fun into the proceedings, mostly through the sexual tension between him and the uptight Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Towards the end of the year, the internet was flooded with on the set images of Hardy on his new film with Reese Witherspoon and Chris Pine called This Means War where he and Pine play best friends who fight over Witherspoon. Any movie where those two go at it is one that is instantly going to the top of my Most Anticipated Movies list.

Francisco Lachowski

Francisco, or Chico as he is affectionately known around the interweb, is one of the most versatile male models on the planet. This Brazilian can do it all: goofy, sensual, sexy, dramatic, intense. And, often, he's able to portray two or three of those at the same time. Chico has a great gift and I hope he continues giving in the next year.

Joe McElderry

I've already gone on at length about why I love La Joe, as we cool kids on Twitter have come to call him, but I still need to mention him on this list. He sings, he dances, he wears leather jackets, he's not interested in Adam Lambert AND he makes me giggle when he falls down. La Joe is clearly a perfect man.

Simon Nessman

This curly-haired Canadian model seems like such a regular, down home guy, especially compared to sexy aloofness that Chico Lachowski and River Viiperi often project. Both types of models are necessary to the modeling world, but Nessman is quite obviously the best at what he does.

Xavier Samuel

I've been in love with Xavier for awhile, but 2010 was the year he made his American breakthrough in the latest installment of the Twilight series. He was so beautiful and so sexy in the film I both forgot about Taylor Lautner momentarily and briefly understood why so many people are turned on by vampires. When he was unceremoniously dragged away by a pack of werewolves to a certain death by the end of the film, I asked my friend in vain if he would be coming back in the next film. Trying to spare my feelings, she told me, "Um, yeah!" The next installment of Twilight will be sorely lacking without this Aussie hunk.

Alexander Skarsgard

The other hot vampire of 2010, Alexander Skarsgard caught my attention earlier this year with his striking good looks and his massive frame. I could only make it through the first season of True Blood, when Alex's hair was so unappealing I could barely muster any sexual interest, but this doesn't prevent me from thinking he's a hot piece of ass.

River Viiperi

This Spanish model made a big breakthrough in 2010 with a wide variety of editorials in a short period of time. His range is nearly as wide as Lachowski's, but he has a signature look in every one of them which sets him apart from nearly every other model in the game. He has clearly taken lessons from Tyra Banks on America's Next Top Model, which is obviously not a bad way to hone your craft.

Joe's Ambitions

Or, in the slightly altered words of a wise man, "Let's face it. This blog is becoming a bit of the Cheryl Joe show.


The Joe McElderry of present is not the same Joe McElderry we met last year. Back then, he was the fresh-faced winner of the UK's X-Factor, a graduate of the David Archuleta school of impeccable, if ultimately safe, balladeering. When 'The Climb' was chosen as his winning single, it seemed like a foregone conclusion the path Joe's music career was going to take. But then something happened. Former constraints in his personal life were lifted and, suddenly, Joe wasn't the same person anymore. He couldn't go on doing the same music he was doing before; it would almost be like he was cheating himself.

Welcome to Wide Awake, Joe's debut album and launching pad for his brand new sound. Right away, the album feels like a compromise between Joe and executive producer Simon Cowell. As I've said before, Simon isn't a stranger to experimentation, as Alexandra's CD and Leona's 'Outta My Head' proved, but you know he wanted some insurance tracks in case the new material didn't work out. Hence we have 'The Climb' making an appearance on here, as well as a cover of the Five for Fighting hit 'Superman (It's Not Easy)' and the tender title track. These tracks are fine in their own way, but, unsurprisingly, it's on the "experimental" tracks where Joe truly shines. With influences as varied as ABBA (the excessively distorted bridge of 'Someone Wake Me Up' sounds similar to their 'Under Attack'), Alphabeat ('Feel the Fire' is blatantly reminiscent of 'Fascination') and the Scissor Sisters (he seems to be taking cues from Jake Shears, thankfully with none of his tiresome shtick, on 'Fahrenheit'), Joe is trying out different styles to see what suits him best.

(Side Note: Curiously enough, all the groups I mentioned as Joe's influences are male/female groups, two of which contain a male and a female who share the vocal work equally. Is Joe making a comment on gender and sexuality by mining these artists? Probably not, but it's an interesting observation.)

Two of the biggest complaints I've heard about Wide Awake is that there are too many covers and that there is too much Auto Tune/vocal distortion covering Joe's voice. I agree that five covers on an album of 11 tracks is perhaps a tad excessive but I think Joe is smart about the songs he chooses to cover. Sure, 'The Climb' and 'Superman' are hardly the most exciting choices but they are a good deal more interesting and contemporary than some of the snoozers Simon usually likes (how tiresome would covers of 'You Are So Beautiful to Me' and 'Unchained Melody' have been in comparison?). And if these two songs deserve any praise, Joe's 'The Climb' works better than Miley's because he's a much a stronger vocalist (and you need good pipes to make that song digestible) and 'Superman' makes for an interesting commentary on Joe's sexuality in the public eye ("I'm only a man/In a silly red sheet"). 'Smile' is a cover of an Uncle Kracker song and I'm impressed that you would never guess in a million years that Joe's version was once sung by the same guy who did 'Follow Me.' As for 'Ambitions' and 'Real Late Starter,' these recent songs have their ardent fans but I like that Joe went for little known songs instead of something as obvious as Lady GaGa. And in the case of 'Ambitions,' the song is actually quite different than the original if you listen carefully. You may not like the direction he took, but you can't say it's a copycat version.

As for the Auto Tune criticisms, I'm a little less understanding. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people criticize Auto Tune for "covering up" "untalented" singers with weak voices or drowning a talented singer's great voice. I've said it before and I'll say it again: AUTO TUNE IS NOT THE ENEMY. It is nothing but a stylistic choice. Many weaker singers got by before it (hello early Madonna) and many others have after (RiRi!). Britney uses it all the time these days but she didn't always (remember how she pretended she was a singer on the ...Baby One More Time album?). It's nothing but a fad that may or may not be here in a few years. There's no mistaking that Joe is a great singer, but the the insinuation he's trying to cover something is insulting. He's experimenting with a brand new sound for him. Would 'Fahrenheit' be as great of a song without all the Auto Tune? I don't think so.

Joe McElderry certainly has a lot of room to grow as an artist, but Wide Awake shows a lot of promise and is a confident step in the right direction for him. He's only 19, but I think he's well on his way to finding himself as both a musical artist and a man.

Joe Will Be the Princess

A friend of mine showed me this clip of Joe McElderry singing Taylor Swift's 'Love Story' on the X Factor live tour. As I've become a bit of a McElderry fanboy in the past couple weeks, I immediately loved this. He is just so freaking adorable. The only thing I'm sad about is that this was performed before he came out so the lyrics are changed so that he sounds like he loves the vagina. What I would have given for Joe to sing the lyric, "You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess." Oh well, it doesn't really matter; Joe will always be our princess.

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

I read Richard Greenberg's Tony Award-winning play Take Me Out on a whim two summers ago and immediately fell in love with it. The play, which deals with the aftermath of Darren Lemming, a star baseball player, publicly coming out of the closet, is one of the most refreshing "coming out" stories I have ever read. Instead of focusing solely on Darren's search for Who He Is while struggling with his sexuality, Take Me Out dares to present both a gay character who not only has come to grips with his sexuality but who does not see his sexuality as a way of defining him and a plot that, in addition to charting how Darren's announcement effects the periphery characters in profound ways, explores other themes such as racism and baseball as a larger metaphor. Needless to say, Take Me Out made an enormous impression on me, so when I heard that my school's (Western Michigan University, represent!) theatre department was going to perform the play, I knew I just had to see it.

Yes, I'm not going to lie: the fact that the play features full-frontal nudity AND guys in baseball uniforms was also a huge draw for me. It was how I convinced my friend to see it with me and we both appreciated the gratuitous display of the male anatomy. But, as sweet of a treat that all was, the real reason for me to go was the chance to see it performed live. There's something about seeing a play acted out that can give a whole new meaning to the written word. Little things that stuck out, good or bad, or just did not even register, can be given a whole new meaning when performed. For me, the biggest eye opener was the character of Mason, Darren's gay business manager. Mason is Darren's only connection to the gay community, albeit it is a limited one since Mason considers himself an outcast from the gay community. What struck me most about Mason in the flesh was just how funny he is. For some reason, I never read all the pauses, stutters and backtracking Greenberg wrote for Mason as funny. He is for sure the comic relief, but I did not realize how much of a showstopper this character could be until this performance. I must give credit to the actor who portrayed him, Max Rasmussen, because he obviously put in a lot of work to make Mason come alive without sounding forced. And I really appreciate the delicate balance he took with making the character more effeminate but never once going so far as to turn him into a horrible stereotype. We laughed at his overexpressiveness and the unique way he expresses his newfound love of baseball, but the laughs were never in a cheap, "look at the funny flamer" way. A hard act to balance, but the actor did fine work doing it.

Through Darren's coming out, Mason (and many other members of the gay community) starts watching baseball as a sort of tribute or a thank you to their new hero for his "bravery" in coming out. Baseball comes to mean something else to Mason by the end of the play, but, in general, Darren thinks this is bullshit and Greenberg makes a fascinating point which really struck me the more I thought about it. Why do we, as the gay community, try so hard to find a political message for a new celebrity's coming out when, in all reality, their actions may have absolutely nothing to do with advancing the "gay cause." At one point, Darren is considering leaving baseball when the return of a racist, homophobic teammate reveals that his team isn't as supportive as he thought. Mason implores him not to, citing his importance to the gays. "Fuck the gay community" is Darren's reply. He did not come out to benefit the gay community nor does he want to be seen as some sort of martyr; he came out for himself and no one else. I think this is a particularly powerful statement and an especially timely one as a new celebrity seems to come out every month or so. Immediately, I thought of Joe McElderry and his recent coming out. As I have admitted before, I never thought much of him until his announcement, as foolish and anti-progressive that is. But it is obvious that Joe did not come out for any other reason than for himself. If by coming out he helps someone in the process, that's great, but he does not want to be a figurehead for the gay community. Like Darren, Joe's announcement gave him something he would not have otherwise: freedom. And this freedom has done wonders for Joe--look at how happy he is in his music video or when performing live now that he can be himself without any repercussions. The joy is infectious, as evidenced by the fact that I tweet "WE LOVE YOU JOE" at least every other day. For Darren, however, this freedom comes with a price. One of the biggest surprises about Take Me Out is that Darren does not expect any backlash from his coming out. He has spent his whole life being untouchable, a monolith of talent who knew no boundaries to his gifts. Over the course of the play, though, Darren is revealed to be more human than either he or anyone else every thought they would. This surprises and scares him because he has never lost control of his life like this ever before. A situation like this should never occur in real life, but it does, and Take Me Out does a fabulous job exploring it.

All About Joe McElderry

I've wanted to write about last season's X-Factor winner Joe McElderry ever since he came out as a member of the homosexual race a few months ago, but, like many of my ideas, that ended up in the long list of Great Posts That Never Were. I thought it was a particularly brave and shocking decision given the fact that he's only 19 years old and had just won his country's biggest singing competition show. I never cared for him when he was on X-Factor (he always felt too safe and mundane to me week after week while Lloyd and Lucie were the ones who took chances and made much bigger impressions), but dropping the gay bomb like that definitely got me interested in him. Yes, I realize this makes me sound like one of those horrid After Elton gays who only supports gay artists simply because of their sexuality. To be honest, I was simply proud of him for coming out so early in his career when he clearly didn't have to. It's 2010 and a singer's sexuality shouldn't matter but it still does and that's something that can only change with time, patience and more people in Joe's position saying, "Fuck my sexuality. How about you judge me on my music?" After his announcement, an even bigger question arose: how on earth was Simon Cowell going to market him now that he's an out musician? Simon gets a lot of shit for his views on what "good" music is and the way he manages to get dire covers of dire ballads to #1 all the damn time, but he's definitely not stupid and not averse to switching things up. Remember when everyone thought Alexandra Burke's album was going to be another Leona snoozefest and it was instead filled with clubbanger after clubbanger? Simon still has a few tricks up his sleeve so his Joe McElderry project had the potential to be interesting. Was he going to stick to the Leona-style balladeering he became known for on X-Factor or would Simon turn him into a screaming queen á la Mika and Adam Lambert or would he do something completely different and unexpected? The questions were many, the answers were few and we could do nothing but wait impatiently while Joe got to work on his debut album.

And for months we waited. Suddenly, however, within the past couple of weeks, Joe flooded the media with new stuff as fast as Nicholas Hoult did after the premiere of A Single Man. First was the news that Joe had taken a side job as a male model while recording his album. I was initially skeptical, but his pictures are surprisingly amazing. His somewhat generically pleasing good looks in real life somehow become absolutely stunning when he's in front of the camera. Joe is like one of those America's Next Top Model hopefuls who Tyra & Co. find kind of boring during judging but are left speechless when they see that week's photo. Next came the release of the absolutely gorgeous album cover for his upcoming debut, Wide Awake. His face was just meant for black and white photography, I swear. Whenever you see him on TV or in a color photo, his beauty never pops quite as much as it does in black and white.

Finally, over the weekend came the first listen of Joe's first single, 'Ambitions.' The song is a cover of a fantastic song from last year by this Norwegian band called Donkeyboy. When I first heard this, I was leery because if there's one thing about the UK music scene I just don't understand is their love of song covers. Every year, whether it's because of X-Factor or the Comic Relief charity single or some worldwide catastrophe that needs a relief single, at least four or five covers top the chart. I wouldn't have a problem if these artists actually changed the song to make it their own, but every damn time the cover is just a lifeless karaoke version of the original. The example I always cite is The Saturdays' recent hit cover of 'Just Can't Get Enough.' The song is cute enough, I guess, but what exactly did they do to the song to make it their own? Females are singing the leads this go-around and the sound is updated to be more "now" but other than that? Absolutely nothing. 'Just Can't Get Enough' sounds exactly like something a couple of my friends and I could produce after a round of drinks at the local karaoke bar. Yes, it may be a good time, but it not what I would call a "successful" cover. In order for a cover to be good in my book, I think the artist either needs to have a distinctive enough voice that whatever they sing automatically sounds like them or the artist needs to reinterpret the song either emotionally or musically. For the former, I like to think of Britney Spears. Her covers over the years of '(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction,' 'I Love Rock 'N Roll' and 'My Prerogative' never deviated much from the original versions, but Brit's warble is so distinctive each of those songs sound unmistakably hers. As for the latter, Whitney Houston's megahit version of 'I Will Always Love You' turned Dolly Parton's slow, melancholic original into one of the biggest power ballads ever recorded. And then there is Kris Allen changing Kanye West's 'Heartless' into a surprisingly awesome acoustic jam. Simon Cowell is usually the one to blame for all of these covers, but occasionally he gets one right, as he did with Alexandra Burke's 'Hallelujah' and Leona Lewis' 'Run.' So why can't he do it more often?

I was initially afraid that Joe's first single was going to fall into the same trap as many of Simon Cowell's covers. And from the moment I first heard the song, my fears were quickly realized. Joe's 'Ambitions' wasn't bad, as no cover of a song that amazing could ever be truly "bad," but it was so faithful to the original, I could hardly see the purpose of it. I was resigned to simply chuck the song and hope that his album would quickly erase the memory of it, but something about his 'Ambitions' pulled me in. I listened to it again and liked it a bit more. Then I listened again and the same thing happened. Finally, 16 plays later, I have come to the conclusion that I now love this song. The more I listened to it, the more I realized that Joe's version actually differs in small ways which make the song completely different from the Donkeyboy version. Where the Donkeyboy version of 'Ambitions' is more or less in the same dynamic range the whole way through, Joe's version decrescendos slightly after the first line of the verse. Then, right before the chorus, you can feel the song building up into a mini explosion in the chorus, giving Joe's version a more pop-y feeling than Donkeyboy's while fulfilling Simon Cowell's love of big emotional choruses. I don't mean to give the impression that one version is better than the other; all I'm trying to say is that whereas I once thought Joe's 'Ambitions' was a copycat, I now see merits in it that sets it apart from the original. I think both versions are great for what they are and to compare them is almost unfair. Now I'm waiting on bated breath for the music video which, judging by these behind the scenes pics, looks to be a good gay ole time. You go, Joe, and be as gay and amazing as you want to be. And in the words of Popjustice, "WE LOVE YOU, JOE."