Random Top 10: Sonny With a Chance Moments

With the recent news that Demi Lovato is leaving Sonny With a Chance to focus on her music career, I think it's time to bid a proper adieu to the beloved Disney show. The show had already announced that it was changing names (So Random!) and formats (sketch comedy), but Demi leaving is the final nail in the coffin. No one watches the show for the sketches, and without Demi, the show will be missing a vital ingredient that made it a success in the first place. Sterling Knight and Tiffany Thornton will have no one to bounce their insanity off of and it will be a total mess. But instead of dwelling on the negative, I want to celebrate this fabulous show. Sonny With a Chance proved to me that Disney shows could be as legit as network TV and got me watching Wizards of Waverly Place another amazing "kiddie" show. Their epic first season should have nabbed a few Emmys, while the second season, although not as strong overall, showed at least once an episode that the show was just as cutting edge as it was in the past. I will miss this show dearly. Let's take this opportunity to honor some of the best moments the show has given us as a way of saying thank you to Demi, Tiffany, Sterling and company for two seasons of pure joy.

10. The Real Princesses of New Jersey sketch on "So Random Holiday"

"Hey, yo, I walked the five feet to the front door so how 'bout a lil' somethin'-somethin' for your Prince Carmine, ya know what I'm sayin'?"

As a general rule, the sketches on So Random!, the show-within-a-show on Sonny With a Chance, are flat and uninspired, an opportunity for lowbrow humor before we get to the real show. But during a special holiday-themed episode filled with So Random! sketches this past season, this gem emerged. The ladies had previously done this sketch earlier in the season, and it turned out surprisingly well, but adding Sterling Knight as a guido Prince Charming proved to be the missing ingredient that pushed this sketch over the top. How can you not immediately love a sketch that features the SWAC cast parodying Jersey Shore, Demi/Sonny screeching "What am I, an animal?!" or a casual reference to Bruce Springsteen's Thunder Road? Springsteen! On a Disney show! Imagine that.

09. Chad and Tawni's Conversation in "With a Chance of Dating"

Sterling and Tiffany were rarely afforded the chance to work together, but whenever they did, they immediately clicked. My favorite moment between them is when they are discussing Sonny's upcoming date with a former flame of Tawni's, mainly because of this awesome exchange:

 

Chad: Why do you want him to back off?

Tawni: Why are you wearing a bib?
Chad: Jealous?

Tawni: I have my own bib!

08. 'High School Miserable'

One of the reasons I loved Sonny With a Chance so much was because of its fearless ability to comment on the conventions of tweenage celebrity and the culture that goes with it. Sonny With a Chance couldn't exist without the Disney Channel and its never ending parade of stars, shows and movies. In this episode, the cast has been fired from So Random! and are forced to go to a public high school. Accustomed to the life of Disney celebrity, the gang (minus Sonny) have no idea how to function in a normal high school setting. When they are rejected by everyone in the school, they start expressing their feelings through song. An onlooker asks Sonny what they are doing. She, shaking her head, says, "Apparently the only high school they know is the musical one." Begrudgingly, Sonny leads a choreographed number straight out of High School Musical. Instead of joining in on the routine, however, the rest of the cafeteria starts booing while throwing their trash at them. The delicious joke at the end which makes this sequence a hilarious send off to Disney's biggest hit: Sonny telling her booing classmates, "Seriously, guys? We just made all of that up!"

07. "Eat carbs, you animals!"

Tiffany Thornton has had many, many wonderful moments as self-absorbed diva Tawni Hart, battling Sonny for the spotlight or indulging in her own vanity. There is this really great moment in the episode "Fast Friends" where Tawni steals the show by (momentarily) helping Sonny out. Sonny has just done an interview where, inadvertently, she goes all "diva crazy" on Chad. She goes to the cafeteria, hoping to get him to admit that it was all a misunderstanding, but is immediately pelted with food by angry people ("There she is. There's the monster!"). Sonny enlists Tawni to cover her while she goes to speak to Chad. Tawni starts throwing rolls at the angry people, shouting "Eat carbs, you animals!" It's a simple moment, but Thornton completely nails it.

06. Chad Being Chad in "Sonny and the Studio Brat"

Chad Dylan Cooper is a one-of-a-kind character and I still stand by my belief that Sterling Knight should have gotten at the very least an Emmy nomination for bringing this character to life. "Sonny and the Studio Brat" isn't his episode, per se, but he does steal scenes like a motherfucking criminal. Witness some of his finest moments right here:

Sonny: Chad, you're so superficial.

 Chad: All I hear when you say that is, "Chad, you're so super blah blah blah blah"

Sonny: I have the sweetest girl here and she really wants to meet you.

Chad: Ooooh, what's she look like?

Sonny: She's nine.

Chad: *hangs up*

 

"Oh daddy?!"

05. Gassie's Funeral

There was a moment in the first two and a half episodes of the second season of Sonny With a Chance where I thought the show had lost the spark that made it so great the first season. The third episode started off with a whimper--the farting dog from one of So Random!'s most popular sketches has suddenly past away thanks to Sonny giving the unloved dog too much attention--but ended with a massive bang that proved the show was just as biting as ever. Chad offers to throw a memorial for Gassie since Sonny is too distraught to do it. She wants a tasteful ceremony which is Chad's cue to throw an extravagant memorial complete with a choir and speeches from his co-stars. While Chad is directing the whole memorial and Tawni is turning her eulogy into yet another attempt to make everything about her, Nico and Grady are trying to make a buck selling useless farting lunchboxes as memorial souvenirs. Coming just 8 months after the death of Michael Jackson and the media circus surrounding his funeral that everyone, even members of his family, took advantage of for their own gain, this is a biting commentary on the state of celebrity deaths circa 2010 ("You saw him as nothing more than a tooting ATM.").

04. "WHY SO SERIOUS?"

Tawni, spending a couple of days without looking in the mirror, ends up looking like The Joker. It's a funny moment that proved that Sonny With a Chance, unlike some other Disney shows, isn't trapped in its own little world and can make suitable pop culture references with the best of them.

03. Sonny and Chad's Fake Date

"Now smile like you're having the time of your life."

From the moment Sonny and Chad first met, sparks flew and it was only a matter of time before they would become the biggest "will they or won't they?" couple in all of TV. It took a couple of episodes, but the Sonny With a Chance writers finally started letting them explore their feelings for each other in this episode by putting them together on a "fake" date to get revenge on a guy who done Sonny wrong. The date starts off with the typical banter that comes from putting Sonny and Chad in the same room ("If we're gonna hold hands, you have to switch sides...This is my hand-holding hand!") but slowly progresses to a point where they are "hypothetically" expressing their desire to date each other. Of course, their original mission interrupts any further attempt at exploring feelings, but it's still a total squee-worthy moment. Another reason this scene is amazing: I believe it's the first time we hear Chad's infamous sign-off "Peace out, suckas! Aaaah!"

02. Banning Zac Efron

"Because it's my wall. And I like saying I banned Zac Efron. There will come a day when Zac Efron comes knocking on that door and he's like, 'Hey, can I come in.' And I'll be like 'Oh no. You're banned."

 

The rivalry between tween heartthrob Chad Dylan Cooper and his more widely-popular foe Zac Efron made for some of the best in-jokes on the show, especially since Sterling Knight is friends with Efron in real life. CDC may be the greatest actor of his generation but the popularity of Efron is something he will always be trying to achieve.

01. "Battle of the Networks' Stars"

I'm choosing the entire episode because how can I be forced to single out one moment from the greatest episode the show ever created? "Battle of the Networks' Stars" is a brilliant synthesis of comedy for Disney's main demographic (children) and a more mature, meta commentary on these tween celebrities. The episode is about Chad directing a movie of his life. After trying to find suitable actors to portray the "losers from So Random!--no offense," Chad relents by allowing the real people play themselves. Except Sonny, that is, who is forced to audition for her role ("This is Sonny Munroe reading for the part of Sonny Munroe"). Before she's even finished, Chad has hired fellow Disney thespian Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato's best friend in real life at the time, to portray Sonny. Shenanigans ensue, which include Sonny calling Selena, in an obvious reference to her role on Wizards of Waverly Place, a "relationship wizard" when she calls Sonny out on liking Chad, and Selena mentioning that she was in a movie called Camp Hip-Hop, referring to Demi's breakout Disney movie. The episodes culminates in a scene on the set of Chad Dylan Cooper: The Chad Dylan Cooper Story. In a move straight out of Synecdoche, New York, Selena has hired Sonny as her "Sonny consultant" to help her get more into character. Mad at Chad, or attempting to hide her true feelings for him, she interrupts shooting a few times, reminding Selena that when Chad's "staring into your eyes, he's really staring at his reflection in your eyes." After calling him "the worst actor of our generation," Chad explodes and they erupt into the most passionately angry fight I've ever seen on a Disney show. I thought for sure they were going to jump each other.

Besides being a truly hilarious episode--even Nico, after spending time with lookalikes of himself and Grady who know how to get girls, gets a funny line: "Maybe they can teach us to be better versions of ourselves"--"Battle of the Networks' Stars" is a sly exploration of Sonny and Chad's relationship. Chad's movie recreates key moments in the Sonny and Chad relationship we've seen on Sonny With a Chance, but Chad has tweaked them so that Sonny has fallen in love with him. Is this simply an ego boost for Chad, a reminder that he can get any girl to fall in love with him, or is it wishful thinking on his part? And after Selena insists that Sonny has feelings for Chad, Sonny decides to don a cloak and wizard hat to become "relationship wizard" Selena, just as Selena has become Sonny. It's a great visual gag, and it does allow Chad to call Sonny "Scary Potter," but it's also a defense mechanism for Sonny. She becomes Selena as a way of distracting herself from the fact that what Selena said may be true. The fact that Sonny With a Chance chooses to portray the Sonny and Chad relationship in this manner is truly astounding; the fact that it does this while also being hilariously quotable is further proof that this was not just another Disney show.

My Thoughts on This Year's Emmy Winners

Best Drama: Mad Men

I gave up on this show last season.

Best Comedy: Modern Family

I don't watch this show.

Best Actor (Drama): Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad

I don't watch this show.

Best Actress (Drama): Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer

I don't watch this show. My mother does, though, and really likes Sedgwick's character. "She's so realistic, James. She's going through menopause like I am!"

Best Actor (Comedy): Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory

I don't watch this show.

Best Actress (Comedy): Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie

I watched the first four episodes. Wasn't terribly impressed or in a rush to watch other episodes.

Best Supporting Actor (Drama): Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad

I don't watch this show.

Best Supporting Actress (Drama): Archie Panjabi, The Good Wife

I don't watch this show.

Best Supporting Actor (Comedy): Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family

I don't watch this show.

Best Supporting Actress (Comedy): Jane Lynch, Glee

Watched the first season. Thought Lynch thoroughly deserved the award. Will never watch another episode.

Well, that was...fascinatingly in-depth? I guess we can safely assume that the Emmys and I have vastly different tastes when it comes to television. Especially when you consider that if I ran things, Sterling Knight would have two Emmys by now and Snooki would be nominated next to Tina Fey in the Comedy category.

Quote of the Day

"My wife [Jennie Garth] is having a cougar crush right now. And I think I had a man cougar crush for a minute, too."

Peter Facinelli on Sterling Knight at the Twilight Saga: Eclipse premiere. The more this man opens his mouth, the more I like him. (Via)

"I've got to talk to you about something."

Chad: Is this about our date?

Sonny: Yes, I just...I think we need to call it off.

Chad: What, is this about me not telling you how things play out between Mac and Chloe?

Sonny: No, I seriously don't care about them or The Falls right now. I just...I think I rushed into something I didn't fully think through.

Chad: That hurts me, Sonny.

Sonny: I'm sorry.


Chad: How could you say you don't care about The Falls?

Sonny: Whoa, whoa, wait. What are you more upset about: the fact that I'm calling off our date or that I'm over The Falls?


Chad: [Pauses] That's a toughie.

Sonny: That's a toughie?

Chad: Well, if you date me, you date The Falls. So if you hurt one of us, you hurt us both.

Sonny: Oh my Gosh. I can't believe I was so close to going on a date with you. What was I thinking? Obviously I wasn't thinking...

Chad: Yeah, and ironically this is a drama free zone so...SECURITY!

Sonny: Let me tell you something, 24 hours ago I fell in love with a guy named Mackenzie and you, Chad, are no...


Chad: Don't say Mackenzie. DO NOT say Mackenzie.

Sonny: ...Mackenzie


Chad: That's it, she said it. Where's my security? You are no longer welcome at The Falls!


Sonny: You said Falls!

Oh Daddy

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!
(Especially to the hot daddies)

Top Performances of the Past TV Season

Last year around this time, I came up with a list of 25 of my favorite TV performances from that season. That post was a major hit, generating more comments than I usually get in a fortnight, so, of course, I'm doing another one to hopefully cash in on that popularity. This year, after expressing my continuing dissatisfaction with TV in general, I had to change this post up a lot in order to stay true with what really fascinated me this season. I expanded my definition of "performance" to include reality TV performance since, in its on way, those appearing in reality TV are doing their own version of "acting."

Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Liz Lemon was her usual wonderful Liz Lemon self this past season of 30 Rock, marching toward middle age still alone, bitter and as relatable as ever.

Joel McHale, Community
McHale's Jeff is the walking definition of a "dickweed," but it's all part of the roguish charm he casts over us and the other misfits in his study group at Greendale Community College.

Jane Lynch, Glee
By the end of the season, the show was an absolute chore to sit through. Lynch's omnipotent villain, Sue Sylvester, however, was always worth waiting through the shitty melodramatics and dumb karaoke numbers to discover. Her constant attempts to bring down the Glee club, often through manipulation, blackmail and out-and-out cheating (not to mention her many insults of Mr. Schu's hair) were always funny, even when the show refused to change anything up plot-wise. All in all, I love the way Sue sees it.

Keir Gilchrist, United States of Tara
While working through the facets of his sexuality on this season of Tara, Marshall, under the guidance of Keir Gilchrist, became quite possibly the most complex gay character on TV right now. If not, he's definitely a breath of fresh air from the usual drama queens and depressed souls we're usually assaulted with.

Snooki, Jersey Shore
From the moment this construction-cone-orange Oompa Loompa with a big ole pouf on her head arrived on the scene, my life has never been the same. At first, she looks like the typical Real World skank who drinks too much and then gets verbally abusive while looking for some penis. Somehow, over the course of Jersey Shore's brilliant first season, she became its heart and soul, the emotional core of the entire show. The moment when she is wrongly punched in the face by some random guido at the bar made this clear, as we all took this action as a call to arms to hunt that asshole down and punch him in the face. After that, however, Snooki became our favorite sexually promiscuous girl, constantly looking for her juicehead gorilla but always coming up with the short end of the stick. Oh, that Snooki, always looking for love but never quite finding it.

RuPaul, RuPaul's Drag Race
Not only was she damn fabulous every week--seriously, 99% of women never come close to looking as good as Ru on an off day--but she was an endearing and oh so lovable mama bear to all of the queen cubs, spouting words of wisdom like "Don't fuck it up!" or "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love someone else?" (my new personal mantra). And who can forget her line reading of "It's time to LIP SYNC....for your LIFE"?

The Cast of Wizards of Waverly Place [Selena Gomez, David Henrie, Jake T. Austin, Maria Canals-Barrera, David DeLuise, Jennifer Stone, Dan Benson]
The Russos are, without a doubt, the realest family on TV since the Millers on Still Standing. They lie, cheat, manipulate and cast spells to get what they want, but there's never any doubt that love is what bonds them together (or the fact that they have nowhere else to go). As far as acting goes, Gomez is a deliciously "dark" alternative to the typical Disney starlet. Henrie has a natural gift for comedy that makes his gay older brother a treat to watch. Austin does stupidity with intelligence. Canals-Barrera and DeLuise resist the urge to play broad as many adults on tween shows seem to do. Stone plays her character's eccentricities for endearment rather than cheap laughs. Bonus points for Dan Benson who plays Justin's best gal pal Zeke and his overwhelming dorkiness/homosexuality.

Sterling Knight, Tiffany Thornton and Demi Lovato, Sonny With a Chance
Whenever these three are involved in the main plot of an episode, you can rest assured that amazingness will ensue. I've already aired my complaints with the current season, but when these three are on (as in the celebrity funeral parody when Gassie, the farting dog, passes away), few actors their age, Disney or not, can match them.

Suze Orman, The Suze Orman Show
Since I started watching The Suze Orman Show a few months ago, I've come to the conclusion that Suze isn't merely a TV show host. Rather, she is a TV Personality with a capital "P." The way she calls everyone "girlfriend" or "boyfriend," the way she yells "DENIED!" at those who really can't afford whatever treasure they want on the Can I Afford It segment, even the way she gives one of her patented Suze Smackdowns betrays a woman who not only knows what the fuck she is talking about, but, also, a woman who knows how to make 401(k)'s and eight month emergency funds as entertaining as possible.

Becki Newton, Ugly Betty
TV's greatest fag hag since Grace Adler brought the funny every time she appeared on screen this season, even in the dire first half of the season where no one seemed to know what the fuck they were doing anymore. In the four years Ugly Betty has been on the air, she has gone from resident bitch to comedic genius. I can't wait to see what she can do on her new show this year.

Nicole Anderson and Chelsea Staub, JONAS
The Jonas Brothers may be the stars, but it's the women of JONAS who rule the show week in and week out. Staub, with her regality and no-holds-barred approach to her character, remains the mostly sweet, occasionally bitter heart of the show. Anderson, who could have become annoying five minutes in as the fanatic fangirl, constantly pushed herself to make the unremarkable material fresh and funny (I especially loved her breathless texting and site updating while on a date with Joe).

Team Griffin, Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List
They always bring the funny, but Kathy and her team (which consists of mother Maggie, assistant Tiffany and tour manager Tom) constantly had me in stitches on this past celebrity-filled season of My Life on the D-List. The show isn't "reality" anymore, if it ever really was, yet that doesn't really matter.

Kirstie Alley, Kirstie Alley's Big Life
I nearly peed my pants the moment when she started pulling that huge branch across the driveway live an ox plowing the field. What I thought would be a self-conscious and ungodly account of a woman who won't shut up about being fat was actually one of the most spirited riffs on reality television since My Life on the D-List. Bravo!

Julia Louis-Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine
In what has sadly become the final season of Old Christine, Louis-Dreyfus continued to bring the laughs as alcoholic, over-dramatic, loser mama Christine Campbell (who somehow makes Liz Lemon look like a winner). My favorite moment of hers was when she accidentally kidnapped a woman she used to torment in junior high when she wouldn't accept her apology. Only Louis-Dreyfus could make a plot as ridiculous as that work. This show will be missed.

Sterling Knight's New Disney Intro

True or false: this new Disney promo is in fact funnier than season two of Sonny With a Chance. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to say true. Everything that made the first season so magical and original has been forgotten in favor of cheap jokes and lame storylines. Even the once electric Sonny/Chad chemistry has been reduced to maybe one short interaction an episode that barely sparks. What has happened to the couple that I literally thought was going to have angry sex at one point last season? I know there's one absolutely brilliant episode coming down the pike soon that, if done correctly, should redeem this mediocre season, but it is too soon for this show to be coasting until this big moment. Sonny With a Chance worked extremely hard last season to overcome any negative stereotypes the typical Disney shows has to deal with; I would hate to see them throw it away with eight or so middling episodes.

The Tale of Sterling Knight & Zac Efron

Do you remember how on Sonny With a Chance Sterling Knight's Chad Dylan Cooper has this heated feud with Zac Efron over who is the greatest actor of his generation? Well, based on this interview clip from The Bonnie Hunt Show on Wednesday, that may have not been hard to fake on Mr. Knight's part:



Other talking points:
1. How amazing is Sterling Knight's hair? I much prefer this style over the traditional "Chad Dylan Cooper" look.
2. He is "miserably single." He may or may not be kidnapped in the near future. Just saying.
3. Bonnie Hunt better watch her back. Sterling is mine, bitch.

Imaginary Boyfriends of 2009

One of my favorite (and, judging by the amount of comments, most popular) posts I have ever done was this rundown of my Imaginary Boyfriends and Girlfriends of 2008. Since that went over so well, I decided to make it a new tradition to honor the hottest guys who made the biggest impact on my year. So, let's get this list started, shall we?

P.S. If you're wondering where the ladies are at, don't worry. I have a whole post dedicated to them coming soon.

Kris Allen
As soon as I saw his pretty face emerge on the Idol stage during Semi-Finals week, I knew I was hooked. When he opened his mouth and that beautiful voice came out, I was done for. The fact that Kris, with his soulful voice and puppy dog eyes, defied all odds and won the damn show over higher profile names was just compensation for the horrific season that preceded it.


Hugh Dancy
I know Mr. Dancy has been around for ages, but 2009 was the year I finally started to appreciate him. Say what you want about Confessions of a Shopaholic, I thought it was an above average Hollywood rom-com with a fiesty comedic performance from Isla Fisher and Hugh Dancy there to match her every step of the way. He may not have gotten many funny bits, but he knew just how to react to Fisher to both make her seem funnier and himself look 100 times more engaging than most insipid rom-com romantic foils. Not an easy task, I'm afraid, but Dancy nailed it. I haven't even seen his lauded work in Adam yet, so hopefully that will add to my goodwill towards him this year.


Darin
No idea who he is? Don't feel bad; up until a couple of months ago I had never heard of him either. Kameron introduced me to the former Swedish Idol runner-up via his cover of Coldplay's 'Viva la Vida' (which mines more emotional depth in any individual line than Chris Martin could muster for an entire song) and then launched me full-force into his entire discography. I must say, I dig this guy. The sound of each album is definitely reflective of the time it was recorded, moving from early 2000's pop to the JT-inspired stuff of his most recent album, Flashback. He's attempting to break into the UK in 2010 with 'Breathing Your Love,' so I hope you Brits enjoy, support and make him a success over there.


Sterling Knight
I'll be the first to admit that Sterling isn't exactly a "looker," especially in comparison with 17 Again co-star Zac Efron (then again, should any human being really have to endure being compared with Zac?). However, he is adorable, has a charming personality and comedic skills actors twice his age should be jealous of. I first noticed Sterling as Efron's son in 17 Again, impressed at the way he was able to sneak some humorous moments in the film when the part, as written, was a complete throwaway. It wasn't until I first watched Sonny With a Chance that my affection for him blossomed into love. As I've mentioned before, Chad Dylan Cooper is one of the best characters on TV right now and it is all thanks to Sterling's fearless performance.


Taylor Lautner
You've seen him without a shirt on, right? Yeah, I thought so.


Matthew Morrison
Matthew Morrison is one of the sexiest men of 2009 because:
(a) He sings and dances
(b) He and Jayma Mays are positively adorable together
(c) Throwing down with Jane Lynch on Glee was one of the season's most hilarious moments
(d) He occasionally raps
(e) Any of the above except d

I think we know the answer to this, yes?


Garrett Neff
I became interested in male models and photography this year and Garrett was one of the best I discovered. His portfolio is extremely diverse, balancing light-hearted photos with ultra-serious, highly artistic ones. Plus he's hot as hell. That never hurts.


Chris Pine
I first saw Chris in this horrible, horrible movie called Blind Dating where he plays a stereotypical Italian-American who, coincidentally, is blind and dating. He was so awful in the movie I never thought he would be able to pull off Star Trek when I heard he was cast in it. Well, color me surprised. Not only was he sexy (oh that bedroom scene!) but he also nailed the humor in the film (I laughed every damn time Karl Urban gave him a shot once they boarded the Enterprise). Good looking and funny? Be still my heart.


Sebastian Stan
He's one-half of my favorite celebrity couple, plus his acting on Kings was beyond sensational. Someone give him more work please.


Chad White
Like Garrett Neff, Chad White has a widely varied portfolio. He has the ability to go from light commercial stuff to dark, edgy editorials and do them all well. Additionally, he seems like a sweet, approachable person. How many male models can you say that about?