How Sweet It Is

Just how much is everyone on board for the Second Coming of Britney? Let's count the Moonmen:

ONE

TWO

THREE

ALL TOGETHER NOW!

THE SECOND COMING OF BRITNEY...IT'S HERE!

In other news, wasn't the rest of the VMA's just a complete snooze fest? I think it was even worse than last year (which is saying a lot). Except for the Pink and Christina Aguilera performances (Wasn't that remix of "Genie in a Bottle" epic? I think I love it more than the original), Miley Cyrus not winning Best New Artist (which I thought she had in the bag) and Jordin Sparks's "Oh snap!" moment to Russell Brand when she said, "not every guy or girl wants to be a slut, OK?" the highlights of my evening were talking about going to jail with my friend Sammi for being a pedophile because we both think Nick Jonas is the cutest Brother Jonas and squealing with delight with J.D. over every Britney win and then slamming all the shit that was going on. I mean, where do I even start? Russell Brand and his shitty, unfunny comedy that was more political commentary and less poking fun at the music industry? Katy Perry butchering, putting through the grinder and then pissing on The Madonna's "Like a Virgin" for a way too long 30 seconds? That completely retarded Lil' Wayne performance? Kid Rock? That lead singer of some band I had never heard of called Tokio Hotel that neither J.D. nor I knew its sex? The stupid idea that all of the performances had to be on the movie sets to be interesting, when we all know that the best ones have all taken place right on stage (like this Madonna performance of "Vogue" that I discovered a week ago)? Blurg. The VMA's need to get back to basics next year, move to New York and focus completely on the awards and the performances. All the other stuff is extraneous bullshit.