The Ultimate Teen Drama

Ryan Atwood as the main heartthrob- a rough-around-the-edges everyman with a sensitive soft side.

Season 2 Blair Waldorf and Series 1 Tony Stonem as the manipulative, eternally scheming antagonists we're supposed to hate but end up loving more than the protagonists.


Seth Cohen as the dorky sidekick who is actually more adorable and lovable than the main character.


Sandy and Kirsten Cohen as the cool parents every teen wishes was their own.


Julie Cooper-Nichols as the bitchy parent no teen wishes was their own.



Season 1, "I killed a man" Serena van der Woodsen and Season 2 and beyond Summer Roberts as the eternally loyal (and gorgeous!) female sidekicks who, in the right moment, can be counted on for a good punchline.


Chris Miles as the slacker sidekick always making the wrong decisions but never less than hilarious making them.


Jal Fazer as the badass conscience of the group who can always be trusted to lend an ear and give great advice.


Mackenzie as the rich snob trying to protect his turf from the invading poor heartthrob.

The Death of Television

For years, TV watchers and critics alike have been complaining that the success of reality shows like Survivor, American Idol, Dancing With the Stars and The Bachelor[ette] are ruining network television as we know it. We can blame these shows all we want, but, judging by the television season thus far, it is looking more and more like the networks and creative forces behind the shows are killing them faster than any reality show. I know I'm hardly television's most qualified critic because I don't watch an extraordinary amount of shows and some of the ones I continue to watch are dubious at best. However, I feel like I need to say something for the sake of these sinking shows I love so dearly.

Let's start with Desperate Housewives, a show I used to be so obsessive about I would tell people not to call my cell phone during the show unless there was some kind of medical emergency that couldn't wait until 10:01; now I'm so meh on it I can do homework, IM someone and eat all while watching it. For a show that started off so brilliantly with it's parody on suburban values and mores ingeniously mixed with a compelling, season-long mystery, it's a shame that the show quickly descended into a shadow of its former self. Don't get me wrong, I was still hooked on the show and loved some of the major arcs (Dixie Carter as Orson's mother, the season where Dana Delaney's Katharine was introduced) over the past few seasons, but the magic of that glorious first season has always been missing. This season, however, has been the absolute breaking point for me. The season premiere was hilarious and hinted at better things to come this season, but honestly, looking back, I'm guessing this reaction was due more to the fact that I missed the characters over the summer rather than the show was actually doing anything interesting. Needless to say, the show has progressed to shit. My main problem with Desperate Housewives is that the show doesn't have any balls anymore. I'm not suggesting that the show was incredibly ballsy before, but it at least talked about interesting subjects that few other network shows would touch (the child molester who Lynette inadvertently unleashes on the world, the dynamic between Bree and Andrew during season one and two, etc.). Now, Desperate Housewives has become passive in its refusal to even mention other darker alternatives to the character's problems. Take Lynette's unwanted pregnancy this season for instance. In the old days, she would have considered getting an abortion and, if the show was feeling particularly risky, she would have went ahead and gotten it. Instead, the word is never even mentioned and Lynette is forced to grin and bear it like a good woman and accept the pregnancy like she's a 50's housewife. It's gotten so bad that I hardly recognize these women anymore. The only one who has gotten better with time is Gabrielle and that's mainly because Eva Longoria Parker continually improves her comedic timing each season. The entire show has been sanitized of anything fun or groundbreaking every year to the point where it has become the type of show that it set out to parody originally. For years, creator Marc Cherry has promised a revamped Desperate Housewives that will return to the glory of the first season and for years the audience has been waiting for this to happen.

Gossip Girl is another show that has failed to live up to its high standards this season. I realize the show has had some tough shoes to fill after some incomparably golden episodes last season (the gorgeously shot The Dark Night, the one where Blair totally owns Serena in front of Yale's dean of admissions, the hilarious and spirited take on The Age of Innocence which managed the impossible task of momentarily making it look like Chace Crawford is a good actor) but it's like they're not even trying anymore. Like Desperate Housewives, the show has been heavily sanitized and interesting subplots either lead nowhere or to absolutely clichéd, One Tree Hill-esque endings. When Leighton fucking Meester (my #1 performance of last season) can't even manage to engage me except for the occasional bitchy one-liner, you know you're in trouble. Hopefully this week's highly publicized threesome will get thing back on track for my favorite guilty pleasure on TV (considering, of course, they pick the right people to be in this threesome).

Can you think of a show like Ugly Betty that has wavered in quality so many times during it's three season run its nearly impossible to keep up half the time? Last season ended so promisingly but right from the start, this season has been a big pile of shit. For a show that has depended for the most part on its main character being hated by every other character on the show, this season has really piled on the hatred to an almost unbearable level. If Marc makes one more snide comment about how he deserved the editors position over Betty, I swear to God I'm going to beat his face in. Shut the fuck up and get over it, you whiny bitch. The show has gotten so bad so fast I am actually dreading this week's episode in fear that it's going to be nearly as stifling and uninspiring as last week's.

I could try watching some of the new shows this season in hopes that something will fill the void left by these bland ones and that would be great if there was actually anything interesting to pick from. I'll admit that I haven't watched the supposedly great Modern Family yet, but if Glee (a fantastic debut, hit and miss ever since) and Community (I love the show but there are plenty of player haters out there) are the best new shows this season, TV is in serious trouble. It doesn't help that most of the new shows sounded either like clones of stuff that was already around (seriously, how many ER clones do we need on every channel?) or completely stupid from its description (Bitch please, The Good Wife. Like I'm supposed to feel sorry for a woman who was married to a politician and has to start life over...as a high powered attorney! Get a real problem, twat). I suppose I could quit bitching and just stop watching these shows but (a) do I ever just stop bitching about something? and (b) I have a hard time giving up on shows--it takes something catastrophically bad for me to stop watching a show I've loved for so long. None of these shows have hit that level yet, but desperately need something to shake things up again. If they don't, network TV will fall one step closer to its demise.

P.S. I know what you're thinking, "Well, what about last year's Emmy winners: 30 Rock and Mad Men? Those are surely still great." 30 Rock has been good this season so far, but there hasn't been an outstanding moment yet to compare with last year's mad season. As for Mad Men, well I kinda haven't been keeping up with that show. I started watching it every week but soon I grew tired of the way the episodes weren't really connecting with each other (they truly felt like distinct 40 minute shorts with the same characters each week). I missed one week, then another and finally I got so far behind I didn't even care anymore. Perhaps I'll catch up with a marathon one day, but at this moment I couldn't be bothered.

Blake Lively is the Whore of Babylon

Just look at the evidence below!

Okay, so I realize that she's filming an episode of Gossip Girl and it's really Serena who is a big fat whore, but isn't it fun to call her that? Working or not, I'm completely jealous that she's making out with the two hottest guys on the show (off-screen boyfriend Penn Badgley and Leighton Meester's man Sebastian Stan). NOT FAIR.

Yeah, I said it, Sebastien.

(Pictures via Just Jared)

Looking Good, Mr. Westwick

I've always liked Ed Westwick, but I think his charm and personality is more readily apparent in his demeanor on Gossip Girl not necessarily his looks. He's not ugly, but he's certainly an acquired taste and certainly more out there than the bland and all-American looking Chace Crawford. So when this set of photographs from GQ emerged last week, my jaw nearly dropped to the floor. Ed is smoking in these pics. Goddamn, who ever was the photographer behind these deserves some kind of Noble Prize for making odd looking models look like sex gods. If Penn isn't careful (and doesn't shave off that ridiculous beard), he may have some serious competition for the title of sexiest Gossip Guy.

As Pretty as a Picture

Ladies and Gentlemen, We Have a Lily Van der Woodsen

The reports are coming in and it looks like the lovely and talented Brittany Snow is making her return to television, after her breakthrough in NBC's American Dreams a few years ago, in the upcoming Gossip Girl spin-off. The shows follows Rufus and Lily, the adults on Gossip Girl, during their teenage years and is set to premiere on May 11th as a special Gossip Girl episode. I can't even begin to put into words how excited I am at the prospect of seeing Brittany every week. And did I mention that the show is set during the 80's? Can you imagine how glammed out Brittany is going to look with teased hair, ill-fitting jackets, too much makeup and leg warmers? Oh my God, she is going to be fabulous.

Life Got Cold

I am truly sorry that I haven't been with you in the past few days. This little thing called the real world has seriously been raping me in the ass interfering in my blogging. In the past week, I've been dealing with never ending school work, money problems, a career fair that I've been dreading for a long while, the daunting prospect of finding a summer internship, a sick grandma and a father who has just been diagnosed with diabetes while his hours have just been cut at his job. Seriously, when I called my mother on Saturday, the only good news she had was that she got a whole bunch of prescriptions for under $10. You know times are tough when that's the most exciting part of your week.

As if that wasn't tough enough, I have more bad news: I'm going to be out of commission for another couple of days. I have two exams in the next two days and I'll be spending all of my free time studying or pretending to study, so that means no new posts until Wednesday. Blurg. But, hopefully when I come back, I'll have a review of Arnaud Desplachin's mindblowingly amazing A Christmas Tale for you to read. Cross your fingers!

While I'm gone, here are a couple pictures of Gossip Girl hotties Leighton "Where is this girl's Emmy?" Meester and Penn "Give me a proper storyline, please and thank you" Badgley that I have been drooling over for the past couple of days. Enjoy!

Leighton photos from L-Meester
Penn photos from Penn Badgley Fan

Blair Waldorf, Je T'aime

Gossip Girl is seriously one of the greatest shows on TV right now. You may dismiss it as simply another teenage soap opera a la Beverly Hills, 90210 or One Tree Hill or The O.C. (which was actually amazing, but that's for another time), but nearly every week it rises above the standards and expectations the doubters have placed on it. Not only are the storylines juicier than any other show on cable (has there even been a cable show that dared to show a teenage man basically prostituting himself to save his family's financial status?), but the show is, on occasion, one of the most beautifully shot shows on TV (that blackout episode was more visually interesting than half of the movies from 2007) and it always has excellent performances from its young cast. The best in show, however, is Leighton Meester as Blair Waldorf, the bitchy, manipulative mastermind (who sometimes has a heart) who runs the Constance School for Girls like a dominatrix. Every week, she gets to deliver deliciously bitchy one-liners, manipulates every one around her to get exactly what she wants and Meester does it all with the ease and brilliance of an actress twice her age. Last night, however, she did what was perhaps the most vindictive thing she's ever done on the show. Here's the backstory: frenemies Blair and Serena are in another one of their petty fights. They both end up at a weekend tour of Yale for prospective students and are given the opportunity to speak with the Dean. Serena sparkles, of course, and is given an invitation to the Dean's ultra exclusive party later that night for students whom he's really serious about. Blair, who's been planning to get into this party for years, doesn't get an invitation and blames Serena for making her look lame in comparison. Apparently, there's this parlor game at the party in which the Dean asks everyone "If you could invite any one person, living or dead, real or imagined, who would it be?" Blair has the perfect answer already lined up, according to Chuck, and he tells Serena the answer (Georges Sand) since Blair won't be going to the party. Serena doesn't feel right stealing it, until Blair manipulates her way to the party and sends Serena over the edge. She writes down Blair's answer and reminds her that the Dean asks for answers in alphabetical order and van der Woodsen comes before Waldorf. When the game starts and the Dean comes to Serena, he reads her answer out loud: Pete Fairmond. Serena is shocked and Blair is smitten with herself. If anyone was like me, they had no idea who Pete Fairmond was, until Blair was kind enough to remind us.

The Dean: Who is Pete Fairmond?
Blair: Oh, that's the man she killed.

Oh my God! The lengths this woman goes to take revenge on and embarrass the people who have wronged her. I seriously could not believe that Blair had gone there. I was in a state of mixed shock and elation right through the commerical break. All in all, after this batshit crazy episode, I want to be frenemies with Blair Waldorf more than ever. She certainly makes life a hell of a lot more interesting.

OMFG...New Gossip Girl Posters

Just Jared has the new teaser posters for the upcoming season of Gossip Girl. Aren't they just scandalous? Not only are the pictures sexy beyond belief, but I love the "bad" quotes from the critics. "Every parent's nightmare" just cracks me up every time I look at it. I seriously can not wait for the September 1st premiere.

My Emmy Winners

Best Performance in a TV Special:

Victoria Beckham, Victoria Beckham: Coming to America

Best Supporting Actress in a Mini-Series or Made-for-TV Movie:

Ashley Tisdale, High School Musical 2

Best Actress in a Mini-Series or Made-for-TV Movie:

Dame Judi Dench, Cranford


Best Reality Show (Non-Competition):

Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List

Best Reality Show (Competition):

Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School

Best Guest Star (Actor or Actress):

Britney Spears, How I Met Your Mother
(And, unfortunately, she'll have to settle for my award since the Emmy's have snubbed her from the Top 10 Finalists list. Those fucktards.)

Best Supporting Actor (Drama):

Ed Westwick, Gossip Girl

Best Supporting Actor (Comedy):

Chi McBride, Pushing Daisies

Best Supporting Actress (Drama):

Rose Byrne, Damages

Best Supporting Actress (Comedy):

Vanessa Williams, Ugly Betty

Best Actor (Drama):

Hugh Laurie, House

Best Actor (Comedy):

Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock

Best Actress (Drama):

Glenn Close, Damages

Best Actress (Comedy):

Marcia Cross, Desperate Housewives

Best Drama:

Gossip Girl

Best Comedy:

30 Rock

My Emmy's (Part 2)

Last week I gave you Part 1 of what my ballot would look like if I voted for the Emmy's. Now, here's Part 2, which consists of Supporting and Guest Performances and Reality Shows. Winners will be announced in a couple of days.

Best Supporting Actress (Comedy)
Kristin Chenoweth, Pushing Daisies
Dana Delaney, Desperate Housewives
Jane Krakowski, 30 Rock
Becki Newton, Ugly Betty
Michelle Patterson, I Love New York 2
Wanda Sykes, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Vanessa Williams, Ugly Betty

This category was so overloaded with great performances that I just couldn't narrow it down to 5. Vanessa Williams is, to me, the main reason to watch Ugly Betty. Vain, self-centered, impeccably dressed and always ready to throw out a one-liner, Williams' Wilhelmina Slater brings the goods everytime she comes on screen. Becki Newton's Amanda is just as treacherous as Wilhelmina, if only more upfront about it, and gets nearly as many laughs being as silly and ridiculous as possible. As a comedienne, Wanda Sykes is severely underrated. Not only is she great at stand-up, but she's also a fantastic actress. She should have won the Oscar for her work in 2005's Monster in Law, her first TV show Wanda at Large was hilarious but canceled too quickly and she was the best thing about Evan Almighty. On The New Adventures of Old Christine, she often has me dying of laughter because of the way she doesn't put up with Julia Louis-Dreyfus' Christine's bullshit and calls her out on it all of the time. Kristin Chenoweth's character on Pushing Daisies could have gotten annoying over time. Thankfully Chenoweth keeps her light and ultimately charming in her own peculiar way. Dana Delaney's latest housewife brought the drama this season on Desperate Housewives and who didn't love her bitchfights with Marcia Cross' Bree? Again, I realize that I Love New York 2 is technically a reality show, but Tiffany Pollard had to get her craziness from somewhere- and that somewhere is her mother, Michelle ("Sister") Patterson. Admit it: you loved her reaction when she first met Midget Mac and thought it was hilarious every time she brought up her "third eye." Jane Krakowski's Jenna didn't get much face time this season, but when she did it was magical. Divas don't come any bigger (or more delusional) than Jenna and we love her for it. Best moment: when finding Liz's positive pregnancy test, her response is "Someone's going to get more attention than me."

Best Supporting Actress (Drama)
Rose Byrne, Damages
Jill Clayburgh, Dirty Sexy Money
Lisa Edelstein, House
Taraji P. Henson, Boston Legal (ABC)
Natalie Zea, Dirty Sexy Money

I gave up on Boston Legal this season after reaching the breaking point with it's preachy monologues in place of actual quality writing and the fact that I'm supposed to believe that all of these beautiful hot chicks would get with a bloated James Spader. The only reason I would go back, however, is for Taraji P. Henson's fierce newbie lawyer to the firm who isn't taking shit from anyone- not even Spader's Alan Shore. Jill Clayburgh is basically the emotional center of Dirty Sexy Money and another reason to trumpet her comeback to the big time. Natalie Zea's Karen is a characterization rather than a full-fledged character, but Zea has so much fun with her messy contradictions and unashamed forwardness that she becomes a real person. Lisa Edelstein, like Marcia Cross, is the most underrated actress on her show's cast and I don't understand why the awards groups continuously snub her. She doesn't have much of a life outside of the hospital, but her verbal battles with Hugh Laurie's House are the highlights of the show and it's fun to see how low she'll stoop to get back at him sometimes. Glenn Close may hog all of the attention on Damages, but over in the corner Rose Byrne is doing some great work as well. Byrne could have copped out and basically rode Close's coattails, but, at times, her work is nearly as brilliant as Close's.

Best Supporting Actor (Comedy)
Clark Gregg, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Jack McBrayer, 30 Rock
Chi McBride, Pushing Daisies
Tracy Morgan, 30 Rock
Michael Urie, Ugly Betty

Okay, I'm getting lazy and everyone knows that Supporting Actor is always the lamest category. Few word summaries for every nominee. Gregg: Strangely charming. McBrayer: Creeper, but funny. McBride: Deadpan hilarity. Morgan: Jenna looks less crazy next to him. Urie: Fabulously bitchy

Best Supporting Actor (Drama)
William Baldwin, Dirty Sexy Money
Ted Danson, Damages
Robert Sean Leonard, House
Donald Sutherland, Dirty Sexy Money
Ed Westwick, Gossip Girl

Baldwin: Makes tranny-loving heartwarming. Danson: Bad or good? Leonard: Right-hand man brilliance. Sutherland: Warden of the Darling insane asylum. Westick: Hated him at first, now unthinkable without him.

Best Reality Show (Competition)
America's Most Smartest Model (VH1)
America's Next Top Model (The CW)
American Idol (Fox)
Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School (VH1)
I Love New York 2 (VH1)

Apparently VH1 is the channel to get the best competition reality shows. America's Most Smartest Model really should have been retarded beyond belief, but leave it to VH1 to find the prettiest, craziest dumb people ever and put them in a house together. Andre the Soviet actually had me cheering for Communism. Tiffany Pollard and Michelle Patterson were back with another absolutely insane season of I Love New York. From Sister Patterson's freakout when meeting Midget Mac to the fight between Sister Patterson and The Entertainer's mother and New York's 2 minute emotional rollercoaster ride with Buddha in her hotel room, the whole season was brilliantly trashy. Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School was just another excuse to bring the fabulously trashy women of the first two seasons back together again. Unexpectedly, however, the show was really uplifting in the strangest ways and I felt better about myself after the season was over. Who knows if the changes stuck, but I was convinced at the finale. You all know I'm obsessed with American Idol so it's inclusion should come as no surprise. America's Next Top Model's two season were as fun and addictive as usual. The challenges were great, the women were refreshing and the judges were as hilarious as ever (Tyra talking about herself all the time and Miss J making fun of Dominique).

Best Reality Show (Non-Competition)
Hey Paula! (Bravo)
Flipping Out (Bravo)
Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List (Bravo)
Kitchen Nightmares (Fox)
Supernanny (ABC)

On the other hand, Bravo must be the channel for non-competition reality shows. I recently watched the entire first season of Flipping Out on a Bravo marathon and I was completely hooked. Where did they find this guy? He's absolutely crazy/hilarious and his assistants are just as fantastic. Hey Paula! was probably an attempt to show the normal side of Paula Abdul, but, in the end, it just proved to everyone how insane she actually is. Some of the stuff she did on that show was so unbelievably nuts I couldn't believe she approved to let it air. My Life on the D-List is always a treat, but Emmy-award winning comedienne Kathy Griffin got more personal than ever on this last season, dealing with her divorce and the death of her father. But it was also funnier than most shows that have aired in the past 5 years. Her best season by far. Kitchen Nightmares is a direct transfer of Gordon Ramsey's British show of the same name, but it's still as fascinating as ever watching him yell at moronic managers and try to turn these dying businesses around. Supernanny, along with Wife Swap, is growing a bit repetitious these days, but during the past few months it's getting a lot of spunk back due to Jo's increased bitchiness. She's not taking any more bullshit from these parents and I love her more for it: You go on and tell it like it is!

Best Guest Star (Actor or Actress)
Will Arnett, 30 Rock
Victoria Beckham, Ugly Betty
Molly Shannon, Pushing Daisies
Britney Spears, How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
Elaine Stritch, 30 Rock
Michelle Trachtenberg, Gossip Girl

Who makes fun of Victoria Beckham better than Victoria Beckham? Her inspired cameo on Ugly Betty was one of this season's highlights for me. Michelle Trachtenberg's Georgina was the cherry on top of the amazing first season of Gossip Girl. Her outrageous exploits in the final few episodes had me addicted in a way comparable to how Courtney Love feels about crack. Elaine Stritch returned this season on 30 Rock as Jack's mother and I loved the way she tried to crack the perfect facade of Liz's family. This woman still has it. Will Arnett also reprised an earlier role on 30 Rock and he matched Alec Baldwin raspy, businessman voice for raspy, businessman voice. Molly Shannon is an underrated comic genius and her murderous candymaker was another reason to love her. Most people will say that she doesn't belong within 50 miles of an Emmy ballot, but no cameo had America talking more than Britney Spears' comeback work on How I Met Your Mother. It may not be Method acting by any means, but who can deny her inspired comic timing.

My Emmy's (Part 1)

As promised, here are my personal nominees for the 2007-08 Emmy's. You already know the nominees for the real Emmy's are going to be as boring as usual, so I hope you enjoy the few "oddball" choices I threw in. My winners will be announced sometime in the future.

BLIND SPOTS: I don't get any pay channels, so you won't see any acclaimed shows like Weeds, The Wire, Tell Me You Love Me or Californication. Somehow, Mad Men alluded me throughout it's season on AMC (which I do get), so I'll hopefully catch up with the first season on DVD soon. CBS procedural dramas annoy the fuck out of me, so don't expect CSI here. In fact, most shows on CBS annoy the fuck out of me, so there's not much from that channel. Neil Patrick Harris is the man, but I don't watch How I Met Your Mother anymore (the only episodes I saw this season were the one's with Britney) so it didn't feel right to nominate him. No matter how wildly you praise Battlestar Galactica I will probably never watch it; I just can't stand sci-fi. Too many years of watching Star Trek when my parents had it on has made me a lifetime hater.

Best Comedy
30 Rock (NBC)
Desperate Housewives (ABC)
The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS)
Pushing Daisies (ABC)
Ugly Betty (ABC)

To be honest, the only reason Ugly Betty made it in is because I couldn't find another show more worthy. I love the show, but Ugly Betty works better when it concentrates on characters and interaction instead of dealing with a storyline. When you get Mark, Wilhemina and Christina into the same room, few can top it. At other times, however, it nearly stalls. I feel much stronger about the other four comedies. Pushing Daisies was the nicest surprise of the year- an eternally optimistic and schmaltzy show that didn't get on my nerves and was actually charming. Who knew that was possible? The New Adventures of Old Christine, for being a show about a 40-something divorced mother, is strangely a show I can totally relate to. The more this show gets going, the funnier it gets. 30 Rock thankfully retained its offbeat sense of humor into the second season. With the addition of the newest housewife on Wisteria Lane, Desperate Housewives felt rejuvenated and made me feel like I was watching the first season again.

Best Drama
Damages (FX)
Dirty Sexy Money (ABC)
Footballers Wives (BBC America)
Gossip Girl (The CW)
House (Fox)

I don't watch many dramas, but this is a shortlist I can feel very comfortable with. House is procedural, for sure, but it never feels stale to me. The ensemble works well together and the medical cases always have me fascinated. The final season of Footballers Wives wasn't as addictive as the first few seasons, but the show cranked its "batshit crazy" meter up to 11 and went places that few American shows do. Speaking of addictive, now other show on TV had me talking as much as Gossip Girl. I was enthralled with every minute and nearly every conversation on Thursday morning had me starting off with, "OMG, did you watch Gossip Girl last night? Wasn't that crazy?" Dirty Sexy Money had not only the best title of any new show, but it also had one of the most in-tune ensembles of the season. The show is pure trash, but it's enthralling nonetheless. Damages was brilliantly addictive in a way that even Gossip Girl couldn't imagine. Every scene had you re-evaluating the last one, wondering if you were judging a character wrong or if so-and-so is really a good/bad person.

Best Actress (Comedy)
Marcia Cross, Desperate Housewives
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Anna Friel, Pushing Daisies
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Tiffany Pollard, I Love New York 2 (VH1)

My favorite category this year was also one of the hardest to narrow down to five. This meant that Eva Longoria, who had her best season yet on Desperate Housewives, couldn't get a nomination, but I'm happy with my shortlist. Tina Fey is the straightwoman on 30 Rock, but no one does it as well as her. And bonus points for making Liz Lemon the most relatable character on TV. Marcia Cross is brilliant in every episode of Desperate Housewives and this year was further proof that this woman should be winning Emmy's every year for her work. Her best moment: her line reading of "Ow, my baby!" when Orson pokes her in her fake pregnancy belly with a BBQ fork. Louis-Dreyfus' Christine is, theoretically, one of the most awful characters on TV. She's lazy, meddling and inconsistent, but that's why I love her. Who else but her would spend a week in bed after Melinda Doolittle's defeat on American Idol and not allow anyone to mention it ever again. Anna Friel is charm personified, but she keeps her Chuck grounded in reality so she doesn't become annoying. I realize that I Love New York 2 is a reality show, but if Tiffany Pollard (aka New York) wasn't acting, then she needs to get counseling because she is majorly fucked up. To prove my point, recall the scene between her and Buddha in her hotel room where she goes from hating him, to loving him, to kicking him out of her room, to inviting him to stay the night and then getting angry when he doesn't....all in a matter of about 2 minutes. Those girls from The Hills should get lessons from Pollard about how to act for reality television, because after 4 different series with this character she has finally perfected her.

Best Actress (Drama)
Glenn Close, Damages
Holly Hunter, Saving Grace (TNT)
Blake Lively, Gossip Girl
Zoe Lucker, Footballers Wives
Leighton Meester, Gossip Girl

The only reason I kept watching Saving Grace after the first couple of middling episodes was because of Holly Hunter. Her character was alive and always interesting even when the show wasn't and Hunter brought much needed star power. Zoe Lucker wasn't given much to do on this last season of Footballers Wives, even somehow emerging as the sane one next to Joan Collins's Eva de Wolfe and Laila Rouass's Amber Gates. But her Tanya Turner was still the fabulous bitch supreme and went out at the top of her game. Blake Lively and Leighton Meester, as Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf respectively, brought delicious energy and zest to Gossip Girl. Serena is positioned as the "good girl," but through Lively's performance you can see her "bad" side sneak through every now and again. Blair, on the other hand, is the bitchy queen and Meester plays up to that supremely well- she's the heir to the fabulous bitch throne now that Tanya Turner. And what more can be said about Glenn Close's triumphant return to form on Damages? She's played these type of roles before, but every moment feels like something brand new and never been done before.

Best Actor (Comedy)
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Steve Carell, The Office (NBC)
Lee Pace, Pushing Daisies
James Roday, Psych (USA)
Ray Wise, Reaper (The CW)

I don't watch The Office often, but when I do I'm always amazed at Steve Carell's ability to milk a laugh out of almost anything. Psych is an often underrated show and James Roday is a comedic firestorm who often gets ignored. No one else on TV lets loose with such reckless abandon and gets the same hilarious results. Alec Baldwin just keeps on impressing me in 30 Rock. Best moment: portraying four members of Tracy's family, racist stereotypes and all, in a three minute span. Reaper's quality varies from episode to episode, but Ray Wise as Satan is the only constant. He's charming, sly and quick witted- just what we want in our Devil. Lee Pace's Ned is a conflicted mess on Pushing Daisies, but his love for Friel's Chuck is endearing and provides some of the funniest moments of the show (kissing through cellophane....awwww!).

Best Actor (Drama)
Peter Krause, Dirty Sexy Money
Hugh Laurie, House
Penn Badgley, Gossip Girl
Ben Richards, Footballers Wives
???

You can tell I don't watch many dramas, since I could only come up with four nominees. Penn Badgley, playing the Seth Cohen role of Dan, isn't given as much to do as the girls on Gossip Girl, but his wit and bumbling/moping characterization of Dan is the most honest and realistic thing about the show. Hugh Laurie has got House down, but that doesn't mean his performance is any less fascinating. Bonus points for keeping the dark humor that made him popular throughout the series and not try to sneak in a little sympathy to make him a "full" character. Peter Krause, much like Stephen Campbell Moore in Bright Young Things, has to be the sane sense of reason in a crowd full of nuts. If his performance didn't work, the rest of the ensemble would look ridiculous and be unwatchable. Footballers Wives was Tanya Turner-less for the first few episodes of the season, so Ben Richards had to step up and take command for awhile. He went from wife-beater to guilty murderer to deeply in love to insane in a matter of four or five episodes and the progression was entirely logical. For the fifth and final spot, you tell me who I should nominate: Is Jon Hamm from Mad Men worthy, or do you have someone else to praise?


I've had to split this up into two parts because it's so long, so another post will come shortly with the Supporting Performers, Reality Shows and Guest Performances.

La Tisdale is Pissed (and Other Emmy News)

Uh oh. This is not good. Mothers, lock up your kids because a shitstorm is about to errupt. I was flipping through the list of Emmy contenders this year and when I came to the Best Supporting Actress in a Mini-Series or Made for TV Movie category, I noticed that La Tisdale wasn't listed for her superior work in High School Musical 2. As if that wasn't bad enough, guess who is being considered? Zac Efron in Lead Actor, Vanessa Hudgens in Lead Actress and Corbin Bleu in Supporting Actor. What the hell is going on?

"Wait a minute? I'm not even up for CONSIDERATION? This is uncalled for! Well, if I'm not being considered at least none of my other castmates will be on that list....WHAT?! They're considering Vanessa fucking Hudgens and that random black guy who adds NOTHING to the movie? This is unbelievable! I'm going to cut a few bitches..."

How could they ignore La Tisdale? She was obviously the whole damn movie and the only reason I've sat through it repeatedly (more La Tisdale in HSM2 love here).

In other random news, Blake Lively and Leighton Meester, Serena and Blair on Gossip Girl respectively, are going Supporting while Penn Badgley (Dan) is the only cast member going Lead. Britney Spears is also being considered in the Guest Actress category for her hilarious comeback work on How I Met Your Mother.

My personal Emmy ballot will be coming in a few days while the actual nominees won't be announced until July 17th (But they will be hella lame compared to mine).